Stewardess at gate: If everyone can have their boarding passes out and ready for me then I can make this go a lot quicker…and if you don't ask me any stupid questions that would help too, thank you! (smiles and starts scanning passes)
Flight from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Dude: Unless you can show me one big titted cat!
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Hyperactive four-year-old: I want ice cream! I want ice cream!
Frumpy mother: Go away, my hair is going to fall all over you.
Hyperactive four-year-old: I don't care! I want ice cream! I'm taking your purse!
Frumpy mother: Ryan, if you touch my purse, I'm spanking you! Now go away, you're annoying me!
Hyperactive four-year-old: No, I'm not, are you kidding me?
Frumpy mother (mumbling): You little rodent.
Hyperactive four-year-old: I am not!
Hair Salon
Cumming, Georgira
Overheard by: Caylin
Hottie: But who do you cheat off of?
Friend: I read the book.
Geoge Brown College
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Tdot Girl
Emo-poser teen girl: Does this make me look like I exist?
Teen guy (looking): No.
Pinnacle High School
Phoenix, Arizona
Guy: So they sent me something saying they had received my application and said it would take six to eight weeks. I got a rejection letter the next day. Bitchbags.
Wake Forest University
Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Tramcar driver in Magic Kingdom: It has come to my attention that people use their panic button to help them find their car. That is cheating. You must wander around aimlessly for a while first.
Disney World, Florida
Overheard by: Kristen
Aboriginal hobo: There is a nice cave outside of Kings Park. Only problem is there's some old guy livin' in it, he's been livin' there for at least 20 years… I'm just waiting for him to die already so I can move in.
Train
Perth
Australia
Overheard by: Dylann
Guy on phone with friend: Yeah, but I think Tommy's grandparents died, so his house might be on for the party if his parents are out of town.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: 8 Day Charm
