Drunk mother to son: Look at the two girls at the bar behind you. The one in the blue shirt has huge boobs!
Son to drunk mother: They look familiar.
Foster City, California
Drunk mother to son: Look at the two girls at the bar behind you. The one in the blue shirt has huge boobs!
Son to drunk mother: They look familiar.
Foster City, California
Drunk sorostitute to group of friends: I'm getting boned in the butt! Who's boning me in the butt?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/378479688/know-your-alcohol-limit.html
Overheard by: pob
Security guy: You fell down the stairs.
Girl, trying to convince him that she's sober: Okay, have a gander at these heels.
Security guy: You were also making out with a man on the couch.
Girl: I'm promiscuous!? All your evidence is circumstantial! See, I'm using words like “promiscuous” and “circumstantial.” Have you ever met a drunk person who uses such vocabulary?
Security guy: You exhibit all the signs of intoxication, you are underage, we must ask you to leave.
Girl: For the last time, I'm not drunk! This is just my personality!
Beta Nightclub
Denver, Colorado
Drunk man to another: I don't know if I should get a sandwich or a fucking whore…
Chicago, Illinois
Middle aged drunk white lady, seriously: Dude, where's my car?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/363293196/its-just-so-sad.html
Overheard by: unicorn lover
Hungover girl: Oh my god! Look at my hair, it's a mess! I look like a horse's vagina!
Flight above London
England
Barely legal drunk blonde: Oh my god, I just walked into the guys' washroom. There were guys at the urinals!
Barely legal drunk brunette: It's okay, you were just breaking down gender dichotomies.
Karaoke Bar
Canadia
Overheard by: Tiffany
Drunk guy: I'm so happy I'm a guy. I don't have to wipe after I pee.
Tipsy girl: You should really wipe if you want Lisa* to suck your dick.
Bayonne, New Jersey
Drunk boy, about text message: That doesn't say anything.
Drunk girl: Yes, it does. It says, “hey, what's up?”
Drunk boy: No, it doesn't.
Drunk girl to sober girl: Does this say, “hey, what's up?”
Sober girl: No. It says, “al aloof ah.”
Brantford
Ontario
Canadia
