Which Just Means It’s Ripe

Girl on cell: She said that she used her vibrator so much last week, she thought her vagina was going to swell up and fall off.

Walmart
Atlanta, Georgia

Posted on July 21, 2015
Default, Fears, Georgia, Girls, Masturbation, Stores, Vagina, Women

I Feel the Magma Flowing Beneath Their Placid Surface

Mother to daughter, regarding t-shirts: We need to get you a big one ’cause your boobs are growing way too fast.
Flat-chested daughter: Yeah, I know.

Hollywood Tower of Terror Shop
Disneyland, California

Posted on July 21, 2015
Body parts, California, Clothes, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Gender issues, Girls, Moms, Teens, Tourist attractions

He Left, While Singing, “Everybody Was Kung Pao Fighting…”

Guy on phone: Yo, g, I'm gonna go out to the club and get me some Pad Thai chicken. Hell yeah, you know what I'm talking about. K, peace.
Paralegal: What the fuck? Why Pad Thai? Why not Kung Pao?
Guy: Cause I don't want all that attitude up in my chicken. I want my chicken to sit down and shut the fuck up!
Paralegal: Get out of my office.

Chicago, Illinois

Posted on July 21, 2015
Animals, Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Food, Girls, Guys, Illinois, Offers and requests, On the phone, Questions, Wishes

Kept Gagging Into My Wide-open Mouth

Guy: So Jeff's cousin came out.
Girl: I knew he was gay! He's like, the only guy I didn't make out with on New Year's.
Guy: You totally made out with him!
Girl: Yeah, but he wasn't into it.

Ramat Aviv
Israel

Posted on July 21, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Europe, Family ties, Girls, Guys, Holidays, Sexuality

Back in My Cheekier Days

Girl : But…why…would you…?
Guy (enthusiastically): I always used to wear thongs!

Deep Ellum
Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: buttfloss?

Posted on July 20, 2015
Clothes, Default, Girls, Guys, Questions, Texas, Weirdness

And What About Cars?

Ditzy American girl: You're from Scotland?
Scottish girl: Yeah.
Ditzy American girl: So do they have like… Ducks over there?

Orlando, Florida

Posted on July 20, 2015
Animals, Florida, Foreigners, Girls, Questions, Stupidity

In Michigan It's Always the 1950s

Girl #1: We have to deal with it for nine months!
Girl #2: At least we get to be bitches for no reason.
Girl #1: Yeah, my boyfriend's basically a slave.

University of Michigan
Ann Arbor, Michigan

Overheard by: …I knew it!

Posted on July 20, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Girls, Michigan, Pregnancy, Relationships

One Look at Dee Snider Will Tell You How Right You Are.

Girl #1: Twisted Sister? Ew! Gross!
Girl #2: What is that? I've never heard of it, it is gross?
Girl #1: I don't know either, I just watched a ton of porn this morning so I keep thinking of things in the dirtiest way possible. Ewww.

Calgary
Alberta
Canadia

Posted on July 19, 2015
Canadia, Girls, Music, Porn, Words

Wow–Guess You're in Love With the Boy

Girl #1: What is meant to be will always find its way.
Girl #2: Oh, don't give me that crap right now!

UCLA, California

Overheard by: Mallory

Posted on July 19, 2015
Advice, California, Colleges & Universities, Etiquette, Girls, Philosophy

Well, We Do Have a Couple Of Pre-op Trannies

Girl: Oh, I'm doing Zumba today at five.
Guy: What's Zumba? Can I do Zumba?
Girl: Well…you can.
Guy: I can?
Girl: Yeah, it's not like there's a sign that says “No penises allowed.”
Guy: But “no penises” is implied.

University of Miami
Florida

Posted on July 18, 2015
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Florida, Girls, Guys, Offers and requests, Penis, Questions

Girls

One Look at Dee Snider Will Tell You How Right You Are.