Teen girl: Being around you makes me want to talk about my bowel movements.
La Capilla
Torrance, California
Overheard by: J-dawg.
Teen girl: Being around you makes me want to talk about my bowel movements.
La Capilla
Torrance, California
Overheard by: J-dawg.
Teen girl #1: Remember when you were Jesus and I was Satan?
Teen girl #2: Yeah.
Upper Hutt
New Zealand
Overheard by: Schmitty
Dude to chick: It's the first day of class–let's get wasted! (both hi five)
Maryland Institute College of Art
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: widget
Chick: He knows how to put it in, he just hasn’t ever done it before.
Laurentian University
Sudbury, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Beebo
Girl #1: So do you have any friends who are total disasters like us, who would want to go to Vegas that weekend?
Girl #2: I have a friend who's getting an abortion next week.
Girl #1: Oh, good, so she'll be good to go by then.
Bar
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: Orkide
Girl #1, reading a text: Oh my god, now he says that when I get home he's going to eat the shit out of that apple pie.
Girl #2: Does he know we've been using apple pie as a euphemism for sex all day?
Girl #1: No…
Gaithersburg, Maryland
20-something girl to friends: And I was like, he was my first ugly boyfriend and my first kiss, and I was like “grandma!”
Maxwell’s
Cedarburg, Wisconsin
Overheard by: and i was like, what?!
Drunk frat boy, yelling to group: Is it someone's birthday?
Cute girl: Yeah! Mine!
Drunk frat boy: How old are you? 19?
Girl: 22.
Drunk frat boy: Oh, I was confused. I was wondering how you could have gotten so drunk if you were 19.
Girl: We're not drunk.
Drunk frat boy: Oh. Well, we are!
Mini Golf Course
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Mom to teenage daughter: Yeah, they swell up big, you shoulda seen it, looked like I had a pussy on my hand.
Courtroom
Houston, Texas
Little girl: Where’s Ben*?
Father: He’s in heaven, honey.
Little girl: Still?!
Preschool
Fort Lauderdale, FL
