Girls

Asian girl in bright coat: Oh my fucking god, I think I just lost my virginity.
Blonde girl: Wait, how does that even work?
Asian girl in bright coat: The end of the teeter-totter seat is like totally up my ass, and it's like penetrating.
Blonde girl: Oh.

Calgary
Canadia

Overheard by: Shawn

Girl #1: I mean, there are those people who pretend to be so moral, and then you find out they're, like, fucking a giraffe.
Girl #2, laughing: Ew! That's disgusting.
Girl #3: Seriously, though, hypocrites suck.
Girl #2: But what would that feel like?
Girl #1: What, being a hypocrite?
Girl #2: No… You know… The giraffe.
Girl #3: Ew… Uhm, horrible?
Girl #2: Yeah, you're right.
(five minutes later, in the middle of another topic)
Girl #2: But really, I think it would depend on how old it was.
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: The giraffe.
Girl #1: Are you still thinking about fucking a giraffe?!?
Girl #3: We need to make sure she doesn't go to the zoo. That can only end badly.

San Francisco, California

Overheard by: that sounds wholly unpleasant

Female college student: Do boys still really have cooties at thirteen?
Male college student: Nope. That’s when they get penises.

Tempe, Arizona

Overheard by: Meghan

Girl (looking at her graded essay): My professor said, “good use of comma.” What on earth does that mean?
Guy: I don't know… We do go to Suffolk. Maybe he was just impressed that you knew how to use a comma correctly.

Suffolk University
Boston, Massachusetts

20-something guy: I had a threesome once with two lesbians. They were eating each other's pussies out. It was fun.
20-something girl: You liked it?
20-something guy: I didn't say I liked it. I said it was fun.

Norman, Oklahoma

Little girl, right before fireworks begin: Daddy, I can see perfectly through that tall man's head.

Walt Disney World
Orlando, Florida

Girl to friend: So, there was this cute guy, and I was standing behind him, and he just started laying eggs!

Government Center
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: meems

Teen girl #1: I think we need to get her a rebound guy.
Teen girl #2: Don't you think it's a bit soon? Paul died like two weeks ago.
Teen girl #1: Hmm. I guess. (pause) Maybe just for weekends then?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, okay.

Bus Stop
Brisbane
Australia

Overheard by: cara

Waitress: Is this the book club? These are your free shots.

Bar
Allston, Massachusetts

Guy on bus: If I ever write a book, it'll be about how to kill my brother in the most painful way possible.
Girl on bus: But he's two.
Guy on bus: I don't care.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Meech