Squeaking While You're Being Felt Up Is an Added Bonus

Guy: So they would smuggle one of these toy dogs in their shirt pocket.
Girl: Why don't they just put them in their bras? It's like “yeah, I got a boob job while I was in China.”

Rutgers University
New Jersey

Overheard by: RU serious

Posted on January 25, 2020
Animals, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Default, Geography, Girls, Guys, New Jersey, Questions

According to the Very Reliable Hobo on My Corner

Girl: I didn't say I was a lesbian cyborg, I just said I was a cyborg.
Guy: All cyborgs are lesbians.

Townsville
Australia

Posted on January 21, 2020
Australia, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, Sexuality, Technology, Weirdness

Some People Just Look Better with Misshapen Skulls

Guy #1 (after guy #2 leaves): Man, I hate him so much.
Girl: What? Why?
Guy #1: Ever since he fell out that window and almost died and shit, girls have been all over him. He's a goddam womanizer.
Girl: He is pretty cute.

Houston, Texas

Posted on January 16, 2020
Compliments, Death & dying, Default, Girls, Gripes, Guys, Insults, Texas

On the Other Hand, Now She Can Totally Come Clubbing with Us!

Girl to friend: Well, if she's dumb enough to use chloroform to put her baby to sleep, then that's her fault!

Virginia Commonwealth University

Overheard by: tim c

Posted on January 14, 2020
Family ties, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Stupidity, Virginia

…Once I Ran Out of Poop

Daughter: Mommy, mommy, that dress makes you look sixteen years younger!
[Later]Daughter: Mommy, if you were stranded in the desert without any water, what would you do?
Mother: [No response].
Daughter: [to little sister] I would eat my own blood.

Old Navy
Promenade Mall, California

Overheard by: Claustrophobic

Posted on January 10, 2020
Age and ageing, Beauty, California, Default, Family ties, Food, Geography, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Malls, Questions, Weirdness

Ever Seen a Cooch Do Three Snaps in Z-Formation?

Girl: Ryan, if you had a vagina, what would she wear?
Boy: She? What if I had a male vagina?
Boy #2: Oh, he would be so sassy!

Melbourne, Florida

Overheard by: Livi

Posted on January 7, 2020
Comebacks, Compare and contrast, Default, Fashion, Florida, Friends, Gender issues, Girls, Guys, Sexuality, Teens, Vagina

And Also Like All the Men in Troy

Girl #1: I used to shave my armpits before I even had hair, just to feel like a woman. You know?
Girl #2: (nods)

Guelph
Canadia

Posted on January 7, 2020
Body parts, Canadia, Gender issues, Girls, Hair, Shaving

Buy Me a Pony and I'll Throw in the Windshield

Little girl sitting in shopping cart to mother: I love you more than the car! That's a lot,right, mommy? (thinks a while) More than the lights, too!

Wal-Mart
Weslaco,Texas

Overheard by: I love Mommy too

Posted on January 3, 2020
Compare and contrast, Default, Feelings, Girls, Kids, Malls, Texas, Weirdness

There Are Men Out There Who Would Pay Top-Dollar for the Privilege.

Girl: Yeah, I brushed my teeth! (pause) You want to lick my gums and see?

Chinatown
Edmonton
Canadia

Overheard by: Laura

Posted on December 31, 2019
Body parts, Canadia, Default, Girls, Offers and requests, Questions

Burned My Eyebrows Off More Than Once

Girl #1: It's like those candy cigarettes you used to get at Halloween. It teaches kids bad principles.
Girl #2: Those taste like crap anyway.
Guy: Yeah, and they never catch.

Boone, North Carolina

Posted on December 28, 2019
Candy, Compare and contrast, Girls, Holidays, Smoking

Girls