Vice principal: Listen up, everyone! The rules of the school also apply at the bowling alley. If you smoke, drink, or do drugs, we will call the cops. If you break anything, you will have to pay. If you hump the ball machine for the sake of irony, you will be sent home. That means you, Aaron*!
Aaron*: Aw, man!
High School
Englewood, Colorado
Salesclerk: Your total is $1.81. [Into her cellphone.] Don’t worry, girl, I am listening to yo’ hideous self!
Lawrence, Kansas
Overheard by: kerblammerz
Girl sitting by window: Oh, John, come here!
Guy: What? Why?
Girl: Because there's a male and female cardinal sitting on the same branch!
Guy: Are they fucking?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Guy #1: This root beer is really… inspirational.
Guy #2, thoughtfully: Canadians like all types of beer…
Hot Docs Festival
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Felicity Thistle
Guy: Why were you guys talking about my penis?
Girl: We weren't.
Guy: Yes you were! I heard you mention it!
Girl: Zach! The world doesn't revolve around you and your penis!
Hagley Park
Christchurch
New Zealand
Gentleman: See, this is the thing — I have a couple of drinks, and then I think, ‘Hmmm… Spiro’s cock up my arse…’
http://community.livejournal.com/overheardinmelb/243261.html
Greaser guy holding kitten: Who's a kitty? You's a kitty! Who's a kitty? You's a kitty! Who's a kitty? You's a kitty!
Punk girl: I think he knows he's a kitty.
Bakersfield, California
Dude: I’m not saying I don’t like this song, it’s just that it always strikes me as the kind of song that people with Down Syndrome would dance to.
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Megan Mama
Guy on phone: Yo, g, I'm gonna go out to the club and get me some Pad Thai chicken. Hell yeah, you know what I'm talking about. K, peace.
Paralegal: What the fuck? Why Pad Thai? Why not Kung Pao?
Guy: Cause I don't want all that attitude up in my chicken. I want my chicken to sit down and shut the fuck up!
Paralegal: Get out of my office.
Chicago, Illinois
Transformers-loving college student: I mean, there’s just so much symbolism in that movie — take the fact that Optimus Prime transforms into a truck. He’s, like, Everyman!
University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: I never thought of it that way
