Guy : So, I was fooling around with your sister that night at the bar, and she was like–
Friend: –Dude, be careful. She’s probably out of control in bed. You know — sheltered life…
Atlanta, Georgia
Guy : So, I was fooling around with your sister that night at the bar, and she was like–
Friend: –Dude, be careful. She’s probably out of control in bed. You know — sheltered life…
Atlanta, Georgia
Guy #1: So, it’s cold outside — should we take the underground tunnel?
Guy #2: I dunno… It’s kind of sketchy down there. Don’t blame me if we get raped by a gang of chimpanzees.
Montreal
Canadia
Thugette, into phone: How it gon’ be warm one day, rain the next, and freezin’ the next?
Asian guy: It’s called a cold front. Take a science class.
Thugette: I don’t need no science, nigga! I got God!
Millersville University
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Female customer: I would never do anything with someone other than my boyfriend.
Male customer: You cheated on your husband!
Female customer: I wasn’t in love with my husband.
Visible Voice Books
Cleveland, Ohio
Chick on cell: You can do that naked?!
Dude: Honey, you can do a lot of things naked.
Blockbuster Video
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Revulsion of People
Guy #1: It doesn’t matter if you can pee longer than I can, because I can still drink more than you, so I win overall.
Guy #2: No, peeing longer means I can have sex longer than you.
Guy #1: … Dude, you’re a virgin.
Restroom, Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: What the…
Man to date: You know what, I like you so much I’d get HIV tested for you.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Kara
Woman to crying toddler: Now, stop it, or that policeman over there will come and take you away!
Man: That’s right.
Woman: That’s what policemen do. They take little boys away.
Man: That’s right.
Outside the John Hancock Center
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: passerby-ing
20-ish guy: If I have a little girl, I want her to either have the highest moral standards or be ugly as shit.
McCool Hall, Mississippi State University
Mississippi
