Woman on toilet: What the fuck is going on with my ass?
Medford, Massachusetts
Woman on toilet: What the fuck is going on with my ass?
Medford, Massachusetts
Fat girl to thin girl pushing pram: Skinny men have skinny cocks.
England
Overheard by: Betsy
Loud woman on cell: I mean I know he was seriously injured–he had a few fractures and sprains and he hurt his neck and back… But hey, that's what you get when you take too many shots and fall backwards down a flight of stairs because you tripped over your neighbor's dog… I'm so glad we won this case!
MBTA Train
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sarah
Man to himself: I will never be able to satisfy a woman because my penis is mounted to low on my body. Damn German genes!
Dallas, Texas
Gay boy to girl posse, seeing commercial for panty liners with extra sticking power: So, like, doesn't it hurt when they stick to your vag?
Fargo, North Dakota
Chick on cell: Hey! I had a miscarriage! Wanna hang out?
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
80-something religious studies professor: Do you all know what circumcision is? (class stares at him) Okay. Well, if you don't, don't ask here. Wait for an appropriate time and ask a friend outside of class.
Canisius College
Buffalo, New York
Guy: I took some ibuprofen, and then when I woke up in the morning all my clothes were off. Luckily, my headache was gone.
Seattle, Washington
Guy #1: Yo, dawg, you got herpes. You got herpes, dawg!
Guy #2: Well, you got HIV!
Guy #1: Herpes is worse, dawg!
Guy #2: No, it ain't!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Flight attendant: Please refrain from smoking for the rest of your life.
Flight over Denver, Colorado
