60-something guy, earnestly, to table full of seemingly level-headed adults: They're going to turn the moon into a weapon, the most powerful weapon ever…
Restaurant
Reno, Nevada
Overheard by: mini-me
60-something guy, earnestly, to table full of seemingly level-headed adults: They're going to turn the moon into a weapon, the most powerful weapon ever…
Restaurant
Reno, Nevada
Overheard by: mini-me
Girl one: Smell my face. Smell right here. Doesn’t it smell great? The stripper I got a lap dance from was wearing great perfume.
Girl two: It smells like pickles.
Toby Keith’s Restaurant
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: At least it doesn’t smell like tuna
Hungover conference attendee: Ugh, it's early.
Appalled conference attendee, scooting chair away: You smell like a dead hooker covered in alcoholic bum piss. And avocado.
Conference Center
Las Vegas, Nevada
Cabbie: Hey, ever get the urge to just whip out your puppies for the driver?
Girl: Um, no. (several minutes later, while getting out) Cabbie whores!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Guy, telling everyone about a massage: You know how grandma's hands are real soft?
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Craig
Guy in wife beater on phone: She said my dick was just too long.
Casino
Las Vegas, Nevada
Man in dressing room to employee waiting on him: Dude, I can see my ass hair. I'm a grown-ass man. Go find me some grown-ass man pants.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Guy to girl: This is gonna sound weird, but spread your legs!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Teen girl: Hey! This lip gloss matches my nipples! And my phone.
Galleria Mall
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Jo
