Guy: I'm so horny, I want a blowjob so bad…
Girl: You're not gonna cry again this time, are you?
The Poconos
Pennsylvania
Guy: I'm so horny, I want a blowjob so bad…
Girl: You're not gonna cry again this time, are you?
The Poconos
Pennsylvania
Customer: Is this a cheese danish?
Hipster barista: It's lemon creme…kind of cheesy, I guess.
Customer: Is it good?
Hipster barista: Kind of… It's subjective.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Sad girl: So we broke up and I started crying, and I told him to leave and he was like “can we still watch Star Wars?”
Short haired girl: It's not even that good a movie!
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Amused
Spanish girl to boy: Sleeping with ten niggas ain't the same thing as sleeping with ten white boys!
High School
Pennsylvania
Gay guy to hobo: Good morning. Did you get a hair cut?
Hobo: (mutters about spare change)
Gay guy: I know you got a hair cut! See, if you would have said hi to me, maybe I would have given you a dollar or something! (starts walking down street) Why do people have to be so ignorant on such a sunny day?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Meater Maid
Old man on subway to perfect stranger: So I give this woman three eggs to put in her pocket. You know, crack. And, can you hold this?
(young woman holds coffee for him)
Old man: So I've got these eggs…
Subway
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Bakery clerk: It's not like my dog is going to run off and do drugs!
Confused person next in line: Um, ha ha, you never know.
Bakery clerk: Oh, we were just talking about childbirth.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Lady #1: I usually keep the essentials in my purse.
Lady #2: Well… I keep a toothbrush, vibrator, and pepper spray in mine.
Pennsylvania
Four-year-old girl, pointing to reproduction of David statue: Is that statue made out of butter?
Small Town
Pennsylvania
Girl, covering hair: I have kinky hair (pause), kinky, kinky hair (pause), and I spent so long yesterday making it straight.
Lancaster County, Pennsylvania
