Mom to four-year-old's horrified babysitter: Poop is not play-doh. That's the lesson we learned today.
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Mom to four-year-old's horrified babysitter: Poop is not play-doh. That's the lesson we learned today.
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
College boy #1: If I were a T-Rex I would fuck shit up.
College boy #2: Yeah, but good luck masturbating.
Hendrix College
Arkansas
Overheard by: College Girl Walking By
Girlfriend to boyfriend: So should I stop peeing in front of you ?
Boyfriend to girlfriend: No, I don't mind. I don't care…just don't let me see you poop, that's just too fucking weird.
Michigan
Overheard by: da da
Girl #1, taking in horrible smell: Whah…?
Girl #2, nodding, seriously: Yeah. Diarrhea. (pauses, then frantically) Not mine!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: phew.
Teen girl, standing up: Get up! I gotta go to the bathroom.
Snotty friend: Fuck you! Carol told you to go before the movie started.
Teen girl: I’m gonna shit my pants at the count of three and then sit right down!
Other teen girls in row, standing in unison: Go! Go! Go! Go!
Movie theater
Stroudsburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Big Larry
Teacher: Did you hear Germany got a new polar bear?
German exchange student: Shiza!
Guy: What’s wrong with polar bears?
German exchange student: Ugh… You have no idea.
Grady High School
Atlanta, Georgia
Little old lady: Are you here to poop? That’s what I just did. Everybody poops. It feels great! Such a relief!
Preschool girl: Yeah!
Girl’s mom: Come on, honey… What have I told you about talking to crazy strangers?
Bathroom, Target
Novi, Michigan
Chick: No, if I take a shit I get the dish soap.
Guy: [nods understandingly].
George Washington University
Washington, DC
Drunk guy to two chicks: I was so tanked last night that I don’t know if I shit in my bed or if somebody else shit in my bed as a joke, but someone definitely shit in my bed. It was a pretty good party, though.
dcist.com
Cop: It better be your own shit you are throwing this time, Martha.
Citadel Theatre
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
