Chick: No, if I take a shit I get the dish soap.
Guy: [nods understandingly].
George Washington University
Washington, DC
Chick: No, if I take a shit I get the dish soap.
Guy: [nods understandingly].
George Washington University
Washington, DC
Drunk guy to two chicks: I was so tanked last night that I don’t know if I shit in my bed or if somebody else shit in my bed as a joke, but someone definitely shit in my bed. It was a pretty good party, though.
dcist.com
Cop: It better be your own shit you are throwing this time, Martha.
Citadel Theatre
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Mother: Don’t talk now, honey. Concentrate.
Little girl: Concentrate on the poo! Concentrate on the poo!
Bathroom, Newark Int’l Airport
Newark, New Jersey
Mother with baby to other son: You are being such a nuisance. Your brother is sitting with poopy pants because you refuse to leave.
Wilmington, Delaware
Fashionable girl on cell: Do you think you can catch pink eye from getting poop in your eye?
Chicago, Illinois
Nurse #1: Constipated and a lot of bloody stool.
Nurse #2: (laughs uproariously)
North Shore Hospital
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Ladle
