Professor, on last day of sex addiction class: I'm putting a website on the board for anyone who's interested in more information on how to become a certified sex addict.
(entire class cheers)
Professor: I meant “sex addiction therapist.”
Student to another: He just spent a whole semester telling us that sex addiction isn't fun. Clearly we didn't catch on.
Chestnut Hill College
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Man at bar: Except it wasn't gin and tonic, it was gin and sex.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/399231318/is-that-extra.html
Overheard by: Ian
Girl: Who are you dating now?
Guy: I don’t know if you’d call it dating, but I met a stripper that comes over around midnight, gets me high, sucks my dick, we fuck, I fall asleep and when I wake up, she’s gone.
Random eavesdropper: Dude, marry that bitch!
Open Bar
San Diego, California
Math teacher: If you fuck with numbers, you're fucking with god! And people get killed for that shit!
University of Miami, Florida
Overheard by: Tormented Math Student
Lab TA, chatting during break: So I live alone, and I have a lot of trouble opening bottles. Have you guys ever heard of the plastic husband?
(entire class laughs)
Lab TA: No! I didn't mean it like that! I just meant I need help opening things up!
(class laughs again)
University of Pittsburgh
Pennsylvania
Professor at anatomy lecture to student touching her own throat: Ivanova, what are you gonna be touching when I'm lecturing on the sex organs?
http://anekdot.mail.ru/inner.html?rubric_id=2
Girl #1: You're too horny for your own good. Why don't you just get a dildo?
Girl #2: Why would I want a dildo when I can just get the real thing whenever I want?
Emory University
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Hank
Guy on Bluetooth: They took the two most aggressive animals and bred them together. What did they think was going to happen?
Oxford Valley Mall
Langhorne, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Tom
Woman: I've only been to Turkey once, to visit my boyfriend.
Turkish woman: That's far. He must be very good in bed.
Woman: We're not together anymore. I'll leave it at that.
Eastern Market
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Intern
Guy, telling girl how to inspect screws in a table: Reach up, right up in there…
Girl: Right here?
Guy: Yeah, can you feel it?
Girl: Uh-huh…
Guy: Okay, now can you play around with it with your finger?
Girl: Uh-huh…
Guy, after long pause: You know, if anyone overheard this conversation, it would sound pretty bad.
Security Park
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Cool Breeze
