Customer: Do you sell Elastoplast?
Shop lady: What?
Customer: Do you sell Elastoplast?
Shop lady oh, I thought you said something about “the last of the Apaches.”
Customer: That film was called The Last of the Mohicans.
Shop lady: What film?
Glasgow
Scotland
Overheard by: somedaftlassie
Little boy, desperately: I need to get out of here!
Kohl's Fitting Rooms
Georgia
Overheard by: Iris
Girl on cell: What do you want? I’m in a fucking dressing room… Oh yeah, I guess there was a stabbing earlier… What? It’s not like I was the one stabbing people!
1576 NE Halsey
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: really?
(a couple at the checkout counter buying nylons)
Girl: I’m really excited for these tights.
Guy (excessively excited): Me too!
Halifax
Nova Scotia
Canadia
[A young woman in a wetsuit and a young man in normal clothing are standing near the packaged meats.]Female employee: Can I help you with anything?
Young woman: Oh, no thanks, we’re just admiring the bacon.
Female employee: Oh. Okay! Have a nice day!
Vons
Ventura, California
Tall, skinny kid: He's…like…suspiciously Asian.
Tall skinny friend: That's what I thought too!
Arby's
Tempe, Arizona
Mom, giving toddler a stocking: That’ll keep you quiet for a minute. [Toddler starts stretching it over his face.] Awww, that’s so cute. Are you gonna go rob a bank?
DSW Shoes
New Jersey
Overheard by: Unburdened shoe shopper
Guy #1, shocked and angry: Dude, she's autistic!
Guy #2: Yeah! But she's a full functioning autistic, so fuck you for judging.
Ikea
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Ferdinand
