Professor: So where else could the US get money for the $700 billion dollar economic bailout other than the American taxpayers?
Student: I think that they should have a bake sale!
Meredith College
Raleigh, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jen
Professor: So where else could the US get money for the $700 billion dollar economic bailout other than the American taxpayers?
Student: I think that they should have a bake sale!
Meredith College
Raleigh, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jen
Layer-wearing college student: We went to Ikea in a Zipcar, and some jerk had left all their Starbucks trash in the front seat.
Queer: You are such a trendy bitch I don't know whether to hug you or puke on your shoes.
Newbury Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: i'd go with puke
Student: Hermaphrodites have everything. They have the whole package.
Professor: Yeah, hermaphrodites have it all. I've seen it on the internet.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Sunday school teacher (showing picture of Good Shepherd): Who can tell me who this is?
Kid: That's Jesus with the whacker!
Teacher (puzzled): You mean he takes the sheep out for a walk?
Kid (pointing to the shepherd's crook): No, when one of the sheep tries to get away from Jesus, he whacks them with it so they won't go!
http://overheardintheward.blogspot.com/
Middle schooler: There's a gay singer in my bra! There's a gay singer in my bra!
Muirlands Middle
La Jolla, California
Dumb girl: Oh, I love The Flintstones. How do you say “yaba-daba-do” in Portuguese?
Portuguese stud: Yaba-daba-doooooo!
Dumb girl: God, that's awesome! I love Portuguese!
Pasadena, California
Exasperated, flustered girl: Sir! Alice* just fell over, I think she's seriously hurt.
Teacher: What? She has my keys!
Marian College
Melbourne
Australia
(Christian brother professor is chewing on the ice of his drink after lunch)
Student: Hey brother, you know what chewing ice is supposed to signify?
Brother: Yeah…sexual frustration.
Student (chuckling): Yeah.
Brother (shrugging): Occupational hazard.
LaSalle University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Well D'uh
Student, showing off his art project: On a scale of one to ten, with one being the lowest and ten being the highest, I was pretty happy with the way it turned out.
Madison, South Dakota
Wild-haired diner outside restaurant (seriously): If I don't get tenure next year, I don't know what I'll do. I'll have to … I don't know … I'll have to just blog about it.
Bloomsbury, London
England
