Girl #1: One time, this Colombian dude was hitting on me…
Girl #2, interrupting: What? Like from Columbia, Missouri?
Girl #1: No. This country–he was like Arab or something.
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: A.
Girl #1: One time, this Colombian dude was hitting on me…
Girl #2, interrupting: What? Like from Columbia, Missouri?
Girl #1: No. This country–he was like Arab or something.
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: A.
Dumb blonde: Our Bill of Rights is so cool… Everyone must own a cat. And the Lion King.
San Diego, California
Pilot, after riding tarmac for 20 minutes: Ladies and gentleman, this concludes our first two miles of our trip from London-Heahtrow International to Newark International. We do hope you enjoyed our lovely tarmac. The flight will commence once air traffic gives the all-clear for takeoff.
Heathrow International Airport
London
England
Overheard by: tired traveler
Queer: You're a virgin!?
Girl: Yeah.
Queer: How do you sleep at night?
Girl: I really don't, I stay up all night dreaming about sex and pleasuring myself.
Queer: I want to be a virgin too!
San Diego, California
Girl #1: Oh my god, it's him! (waves enthusiastically to an approaching car) Isn't he amazing?
Girl #2: He almost ran you over.
Girl #1: It doesn't matter, as long as he's on top of me!
Silicon Valley, California
Ditz #1: …and then I was like, “Why did I fail spring semester, sir?” and then he was like, “You asked me if The Odyssey was an actual event, and stated that it was in every one of your papers on the subject, even after I told you it wasn't.”
Ditz #2: Wait, it wasn't?
Loyola University
Chicago, Illinois
Intellectual: No, they believe that a guy flew a 747 through space, dumped a bunch of frozen souls in a volcano, and they escaped and are possessing mankind.
Chino High School
Chino, California
Professor: Many theaters are located in New York's East Village, located in the northwestern part of Manhattan.
OSU Theatre Class
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Rachel Jane
Student, talking about Marxism and class struggle: Above ground, it's really nice, and there are buildings and cars, so that's the bourgeoisie. And underground is the proletariat, because it's messy, and it's basically just…dirt.
(class nods in silent awe).
High School
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: embarassed to be here
