We Respect That You Didn’t Take the Easy Route with “Robert Downey Jr.”

Girl: “Pokemon Stadium,” is just stupid. If the other Pokemon does some confusion attack, you just end up slapping yourself or some shit. No one gets so confused they hurt themselves!
Boy: Tell that to Danny Bonaduce.

Worcester, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Katie

Posted on July 22, 2019
About celebrities, Compare and contrast, Games, Girls, Gossip, Guys, Massachusetts, TV shows, Violence

And Can You Wear Your Leather Pants Again?

(five-year-old girl tries to hit puppy with a toy)
Step-mom: I’m gonna hit you with that toy.
Five-year-old girl: How hard?

Fresno, California

Posted on June 16, 2019
California, Default, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Threats, Toys, Violence

As Depicted in All of My Paintings

Mother to daughter: I swear, next time you’re going to smack your mouth on something and I’m just going to move you to the side and leave you there and watch the blood run down.

On Line for Space Mountain
Disney World, Florida

Overheard by: Kat

Posted on May 9, 2019
Florida, Kids, Moms, Mouth, Threats, Tourist attractions, Violence, Weirdness

Paul McCartney and Heather Mills Hammer Out a Payment Plan

Girl: So if you won £100,000,000 on the lottery what would you do?
Guy: Settle some scores. There'd be a few guys from school who'd be going to work one day and suddenly find themselves being bundled into the back of a van with a black bag over their head.
Girl: Then flown out over the north Atlantic, tied up, thrown out of the plane?
Guy: I like the way you think. We should have kids.
Girl: Nah, to get into my pants you'll need to do better than that. £2,000 of jewelery would do it. (cackles hysterically)

London
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Posted on May 1, 2019
Compliments, England, Girls, Guys, Money, Questions, Sex, Violence

…Full Of Heroin?

Middle-aged black woman to husband: Baby, you remember that time I shot you?

CVS
Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted on April 29, 2019
Crimes, Default, Hubbies, Memory lane, Questions, Relationships, Stores, Thugs, Violence, Women

As Long As You Don’t Lie in the Same Bed Together, It’s All Good

Man: What does it say in the bible about punching your son in the face?

Starbucks
Durham, North Carolina

Overheard by: wondering the same thing myself

Posted on April 26, 2019
Books, Guys, North Carolina, Offspring, Parenting, Questions, Religion, Restaurants, Violence

A Mom Can Dream, Can’t She?

Angry mother on the bus: Come here and sit down!
Four-year-old: No, it’s okay. I’m being good.
Angry mother: This bus is going to stop suddenly and you’re going to fall down and crack your head open on one of the bars, and before the bus gets back around to the hospital you will bleed to death!

Pullman, Washington

Overheard by: jeff