Weirdness

Girl #1: Did you finish your French project?
Girl #2: Yeah.
Girl #1: Did you puke on it?
Girl #2: No, not this time.

Laguna Hills, California

Girl #1: Well, today wasn't a total loss, I did find my outfit for tomorrow.
Girl #2: True. By the way, what's tomorrow?
Girl #1: Uh, Thursday. You mean like the date?
Girl #2: No, I mean: what's the occasion for the outfit?
Girl #1: Oh, right! Thursday.

Dulles Town Center
Loudoun County, Virginia

Professor: It must seem like I'm beating you over the head with a frozen chicken breast.

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

The Zagat Guide Says So

Guy: You never know, perhaps he'll like it.
Girl, happily: I taste… Horrendous!

Oxford
England

Overheard by: Tim

20-something guy #1, carrying case of beer and bag of onions: You know when your aura gets all out of whack?
20-something guy #2, carrying same: Yeah, you just gotta get it back on track!

Austin, Texas

Overheard by: wondering if beer and onions will be part of the ritual to restore his aura

Guy #1: I once tried to hit on a chick while I was drunk and throwing up, but now that's just a fun story I tell and nobody lost their respect for me.
Guy #2: Except for the girl you were hitting on.
Guy #1: Well, I don't know. Her nickname was “dicktooth.”

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Claire

Teenage girl to friends: The groin is the eye, no?
Teen friend: The eyes are the groin of the face!
First teen: Right!

Ferry
Larkspur, California

Overheard by: I Know, I know

Peasant husband in bookshop, holding up book: Hey, look at this!
Peasant wife: That's the problem with books, they make you do things.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Nine-year-old: Logan almost got a girlfriend!
Six-year-old: Really?
Nine-year-old: Yep. Remember Courtney?
Six-year-old: With the glasses?
Nine-year-old: Yeah. He asked her out on the bus, but she said no. After that, Joe was like, “I want a girlfriend,” and I was like, “yeah, I know. Me, too, buddy. Me, too.”

Swimming Pool
Louisiana

Girl: Well, the sad thing is I'm gonna have to treat you like Morgan when she doesn't want to take her ear infection pills.

Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts