Anyone Wanna Teabag?

Dude, after receiving dickhead hat on 50th birthday: Hey, look! My double chin looks like a pair of balls in a nutsack!

Columbia, Missouri

Overheard by: Tiger Fan

Posted on February 14, 2023
Age and ageing, Balls, Body parts, Clothes, Compare and contrast, Guys, Missouri, Penis

Why Is There One In Your Office?

Thesis advisor to uncomfortable-looking advisees: You girls might be too young for it, but if you ever have the chance to have sex on a water bed, you should do it.

Colgate University
Madison County, New York

Posted on January 31, 2023
Advice, Age and ageing, Colleges & Universities, Education, New York, Sex, Students, Teachers

We Smell the Plot Of a New Indiana Jones Movie!

Mini-skirt girl: Her name is Pearl, so she's either an 80-year-old white lady from Connecticut…
Suit: Or an 18-year-old, French-speaking lieutenant in an Asian motorcycle gang.
Mini-skirt girl: Yours is weirdly specific.

Bridgeport, Connecticut

Overheard by: Agreed

Posted on October 12, 2022
Age and ageing, Compare and contrast, Connecticut, Girls, Names, Suits, Weirdness

DeadSpace!

Friend #1: God! Old people get so pissy when they don't get their obituaries on time.
Friend #2: Why?
Friend #1: Because they want to know which of their friends has died that week.
Friend #2: Oh, so it's like Facebook for the elderly!

Memorial Hospital
Sudbury
Ontario, Canadia

Overheard by: Dani

Posted on June 11, 2022
Age and ageing, Canadia, Compare and contrast, Death & dying, Default, Feelings, Friends, Internet

Would You Say It While Brandishing a Riding Crop?

35-year-old man: Do you know what I did for you? I left my home, my wife. I cheated because I was cheated on, I know what that's like. You're turning 30, you need a man, what's a woman at 30? You're alone!
28-year-old woman: You're having a midlife crisis. Women don't get those. I'm there for you, like, “you should stop at three drinks because you're a terrible drunk.”
35-year-old man: You'd do that for me?

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Matt

Posted on May 17, 2022
Age and ageing, Default, Drinking & drunks, Feelings, Gender issues, Guys, Illinois, Infidelity, Offers and requests, Questions, Relationships, Women

…Even Though It's Shaped Like St. Peter?

Girlfriend, excited: I know exactly what I'm going to get you for your birthday this year.
Boyfriend: Oh yeah? I know exactly what I am going to get you for your birthday.
Girlfriend: Really? Are you going to get that thing cut off your back?

Cafe
Sydney
Australia

Posted on October 3, 2021
Age and ageing, Australia, Couples, Default, Girls, Guys, Offers and requests, Questions, Restaurants

I Hate When They Do It While You're Driving, and You Can't See the Road

Frustrated gamer playing The Legend of Zelda: Did you see that? She's such a slut! Her vagina was just totally up in link's face. And he's like, twelve. Why are women like that all the time?

University of Massachusetts

Overheard by: the girl in the corner cramming for finals