These Are the Moments They'll Cherish Forever

Mom to six-year-old daughter: Naiya, you better not be swimming in that toilet, or I will punch you in the neck!

Restaurant Bathroom
Delaware

Overheard by: Laughing Neighbor

Posted on September 24, 2009
Body parts, Delaware, Family ties, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Restaurants, Restroom, Threats, Weirdness

If God Were Irish

Teenage girl: Potato chips are like flakes of god's skin.

Rumson, New Jersey

Posted on September 22, 2009
Body parts, Compare and contrast, Food, God, New Jersey, Teens

Didn't I See This in Kindergarten Cop?

Teacher, pointing to female student: You have ovaries. (pointing to self) I have testes.

High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado

Posted on September 18, 2009
Balls, Body parts, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Education, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, Teachers

The Airlines Don't Even Pretend to Care Anymore

Guy on cell: Well, there's a chance you'll get burns all over your body, but other than that you should be fine.

Louisville, Kentucky

Posted on September 17, 2009
Body parts, Guys, Health & Hygiene, Kentucky, On the phone

Raise Your Hand If You're Married to Her

Woman, looking at exhibit containing jellyfish: But where are their brains? Where do you think their brains are? Where would they keep their brains? Where are the brains? Where are their brains? The brains? Where do you think they keep the brains? Huh… I wonder where their brains are?

Aquarium
North Carolina

Overheard by: Kellllyyyyy

Posted on September 15, 2009
Animals, Body parts, North Carolina, Questions, Women

And Then I'll Have to French-Kiss You, in a “Thank-You-for-Smacking-Me” Kind Of Way

Marine #1, on plane: Since you got the window seat, I might lean my head on your shoulder for part of this flight. Not in a gay way, more in a I'm-tired-and-want-to-lean-my-head-on-something kind of way.
Marine #2: Alright, but I might have to smack you. Not in an I-hate-you kind of way, more in a get-your-head-off-my-damn-shoulder kind of way.

Airplane
Atlanta, Georgia

Posted on September 4, 2009
Airports & flights, Body parts, Georgia, Military, Offers and requests, Sexuality, Threats, Weirdness, Wishes

No Licking Above the Waist!

Girlfriend: Hold my hand, Eric. Please.
Boyfriend, yelling: No! Just stop it, okay?
Girlfriend: Come on. Just hold my hand.
Boyfriend: No! I'm not doing that again.
Girlfriend, laughing: Aw, why not?
Boyfriend: Because last time you licked my face!

Lawrenceville, New Jersey

Overheard by: Jake

Posted on August 31, 2009
Body parts, Couples, Hands, New Jersey, Offers and requests, Weirdness

Best Boss I've Ever Had!

Girl: So Jack sucked my thumb today.
Friends: Really?
Girl: Yeah, he sucked my thumb, then wiped his snot on my arm, licked my leg, and told me he wanted to go to the office.

Simsbury, Connecticut

Overheard by: rehreh88