Guy: Do you know how I know you were singing correctly?
Girl: You saw me sucking in my stomach?
Guy: No. When you started spitting at me!
Girl: I can't help that I have great diction!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
Guy: Do you know how I know you were singing correctly?
Girl: You saw me sucking in my stomach?
Guy: No. When you started spitting at me!
Girl: I can't help that I have great diction!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
Girl in puffy pink coat: I went to Jared's yesterday and I was all like, “you're a jerk.” Know what I mean?
Girl in puffy white coat: I dunno. My nails are orange.
Illinois institute
Overheard by: abbie
Girlfriend to boyfriend: I did the most useless thing today. I stuck something into another thing and pretended it had feet.
Trondheim
Norway
Overheard by: Knowbuddy
Statistics teacher: There is a correlation between cats and happiness. Cats make people happy. But not all cats. I still have nightmares about some cats. When I was a little girl, there was this cat, Greta, who lived outdoors. I wanted to pet her, but she scratched up my whole arm and got her claws into my protoplasm!
Atlanta, Georgia
Preppy girl #1: So I had it all over me, it was on my hands and my face…
Preppy girl #2: Oh my god! Did you throw up?
San Luis Obispo, California
20-something guy: I'm gonna buff the shit out of my nails!
Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Mom to six-year-old daughter: Naiya, you better not be swimming in that toilet, or I will punch you in the neck!
Restaurant Bathroom
Delaware
Overheard by: Laughing Neighbor
Teenage girl: Potato chips are like flakes of god's skin.
Rumson, New Jersey
Teacher, pointing to female student: You have ovaries. (pointing to self) I have testes.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Guy on cell: Well, there's a chance you'll get burns all over your body, but other than that you should be fine.
Louisville, Kentucky
