Canadia

One Look at Dee Snider Will Tell You How Right You Are.

Girl #1: Twisted Sister? Ew! Gross!
Girl #2: What is that? I've never heard of it, it is gross?
Girl #1: I don't know either, I just watched a ton of porn this morning so I keep thinking of things in the dirtiest way possible. Ewww.

Calgary
Alberta
Canadia

Dude: Cool, you were in Asia… How was it?
Chick: The tsunami was the best thing for Thailand, everything was so clean and pretty afterwards.

Winnipeg
Manitoba
Canadia

Overheard by: Sean_G

Old lady with husband talking to head usher: We are in Row C, Seats 22 and 23. Ummm… Do you think we could move our seats? It’s just that the lady next to us is rather large, and she is overflowing onto my husband, who is overflowing on to me…

Thousand Islands Play House
Gananoque, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Shmemily

Guy, to girl: Why don't you like to get divorced?

Ottawa
Canadia

Guy, chuckling: Can you give me a blowjob?
Girl, also chuckling: No! Why would I do that?
Guy: Come on! Please?
Girl: No! (laughs)
Guy: Why not?
Girl: Just… No. Guy, please, there has to be some reason, just, why not?
Girl: There is no reason, I'm just not giving you a blowjob.
Guy: Oh. Come on! Please? There has to be a reason why.
Girl: I'm not giving you a blowjob because… (sighs) My mom says you would be a choking hazard, and I don't want to choke.

High School
Canadia

Teen goth girl to crying friend: Ignore the guys. They’re all jerks, especially at this age. Go for the ones that are, like, twenty. Actually, that’s a little young. I aim for the men in their 30s or 40s. That way their kids are your age, so you can bond better with them.

Heritage Park
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia

Overheard by: c.j.

Girl #1: You’ve written “2007” instead of “2008” on your exam sheet.
Girl #2: Yeah, so? It was a better time, ok?

University of Guelph
Canadia

Professor: Temperature is an example of an invented reality. Temperature doesn’t exist. It’s all in our minds. It’s either hot or cold out, but what are “degrees” really? Nothing!
Student: Actually, temperature is scientifically calculated by… (goes on to give long, technical explanation)
Professor: Really? I’m going to have to go look that up on Wikipedia. I get all of my information from Wikipedia.

University of Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Glad you’re teaching us then…

Girl to pregnant friend: You're just like Mary, mother of Jesus…except she knew who the father was.

Toronto
Canadia

Hobo, panhandling to passer-bys: Can anyone spare some change so I can buy a little wine, some booze, some cheese, a little pot… Maybe some nuclear weapons…

Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: http://psychedelicmess.blogspot.com