College chick: I, like, physically cannot get good grades… I think the problem is in my brain.
University of North Carolina – Chapel Hill
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Overheard by: KAT
College chick: I, like, physically cannot get good grades… I think the problem is in my brain.
University of North Carolina – Chapel Hill
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Overheard by: KAT
Professor: Say that you were to walk into class, and I was wearing…a red thong.
(students laugh) I'm not done. I also have sequins on my nipples–and my hair is in a red Mohawk. Half of you would turn around and walk out. The other half would think, “Eh, I can always drop the class.”
Santa Rosa Junior College
Santa Rosa, California
Nerdy philosophy professor: The word that comes to mind when I think about grading multiple-choice tests is 'bloodbath'.
Catholic University
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Ditto.
Dude #1: Dude, are you still drunk?
Dude #2: Maybe a little, how could you tell?
Dude #1: You smell like beer, weed, and hooker spit!
Lecture Hall
University of Tennessee
Overheard by: bluecollarbelle
Girl on cell: Wait… Wait! You’re telling me she’s not a zombie? You mean she’s actually dead?
Emory College
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Zack
Professor: So, how was survey of western music?
Girl: It was terrible: someone would always find a way to bring up gender issues. I mean, I hate to break it to you, but eighteenth century tonal music doesn’t give a shit about your vagina.
Sarah Lawrence College
Bronxville, New York
College girl to friend: the nice thing about a toga is that you don't have to wear Spanx with it.
Metro State College of Denver
Denver, Colorado
Brunette: I don't think dinosaurs were ever real.
Blonde: Why is that?
Brunette: If they were really that big, only like ten could fit on earth. They wouldn't even be able to walk around much.
Blonde: Oh, you're probably right. I've never thought about it like that before.
Northern Michigan University
Professor, talking about his eight-year-old son: Don't invest in anything that eats.
Rutgers University
New Jersey
Girl #1: So, how did she find out?
Girl #2: I was right in the middle of vomiting and my mom opened the door and said, ‘You’ve been binge drinking and having unprotected sex?!’
Girl #1: … So, how did she find out?
College of Charleston
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Addison
