Freshman guy: It's been in my mouth for almost a minute now, and I'm still not sure what it is.
Freshman girl: Scary thought, isn't it?
Dining Hall, Arcadia University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Freshman guy: It's been in my mouth for almost a minute now, and I'm still not sure what it is.
Freshman girl: Scary thought, isn't it?
Dining Hall, Arcadia University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Sorority chick #1: Hey, you know there’s Bible study in my room at eight tonight?
Sorority chick #2: Hmmm, eight? Okay, I guess I can come.
Sorority chick #1: And then we can go get wasted!
Ladies’ locker room, University of Tennessee
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: New Yorker
Guy with clipboard: Do you have a minute for human rights?
Guy walking by: No. (pause) Wait, did you say humans rights?
Guy with clipboard: Yes.
Guy walking by: Oh, I thought you were one of those crazy environmentalist people.
Guy with clipboard: No, we're crazy gay rights people.
University of Colorado, Boulder
Overheard by: Violentvixen
Bimbette, as Dalai Lama approaches podium: He’s supposed to be the reincarnation of, like, God or whatever.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: velvin
Ethics professor: Killing drug dealers is okay, but killing priests is wrong. Wait, I may have that backwards…
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Girl to friends trying to eat lunch: And then all of a sudden his penis started groundhoging!
Friends: (blank stare)
Franklin Dining Hall, UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Cate
Professor, to newbie class: So…let's start with everyone telling me a secret about themselves so I can try and remember your names. You (pointing to student) start.
Student, tentatively: Ummm…I eat cold spaghetti in the morning?
Professor: Ewww! Fantastic.
University of Zurich
Switzerland
Overheard by: Stephanie
Band geek, eating lunch, to friends: I've come to the realization that if I were a woman, I'd have amazing breasts.
Rutgers University
Camden, New Jersey
Overheard by: One time at band camp…
Scholar: Handicapped people would be hot if they could, like, use their legs and stuff.
Bryn Mawr College
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Male lecturer to friend: Well: in my defense, it wasn't my dildo.
Lancaster University
England
