Girl to friends: Well, he's really nice, but I'm not sure if he'd like destroying the babies.
Oxford
England
Overheard by: HERTFORD
Girl to friends: Well, he's really nice, but I'm not sure if he'd like destroying the babies.
Oxford
England
Overheard by: HERTFORD
Guy: Didn’t you have a friend who lost her virginity to her shoe?
Green haired girl: Yeah. She fell on her foot and ruptured it or something. Like riding a horse.
Pink haired girl: What the fuck?
Guy: Told you!
Green haired girl: I felt bad when she told us because I was the only one busting up laughing.
California
Little girl in cart: Cheetos! That's my favorite snack!
Mom: No! Fruit is your favorite snack, remember?
Flemmington, New Jersey
Teacher: Who knows what the word “cell” means?
4th-grader: Oh, I do, I do! It's a tiny thing like a jelly doughnut! Except instead of jelly, there's blood!
Elementary School
Washington, DC
Four-year-old boy, dancing happily down sidewalk: I'm like a princess! I'm like Cinderella!
Mother: Except you stink. So more like stinkerella.
Calgary
Canadia
Naked dude #1: I'm really surprised by how long it is.
Naked dude #2: Yeah… It's quite long.
Locker Room
Kansas City, Missouri
Girl: I hate violinists!
Boy: What?
Girl: Violinists.
Boy: Oh. I thought you said “gang-bangers.”
BART Airport Train
San Francisco, California
Artsy tourist to touristy-looking woman: More cats, more money!
Outside Museum of Turkish and Islamic Art
Istanbul
Turkey
Professionally dressed Asian girl (in a low voice): I can’t believe you showed that girl your pubes, man!
Short, pudgy Asian guy (in a low indignant voice): Well *I* can’t believe you showed her your innie nipple!
Elevator, Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Hipster chick: I am who I am and that’s what I like about me, but it keeps getting me into these shitty situations.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
