Compare and contrast

White father: There’s Burger King, Subway, Taco Bell.
Six-year-old son: [no response].
White father: There’s sushi.
Six-year-old son: Aw shizzle!

Food Court, King of Prussia Mall
Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Carrie

Guy: If you bang a girl unprotectedly, you have to keep banging her protectedly to make sure she doesn't start showing.

Allston, Massachusetts

Cashier #1: He's definitely overcompensating for something.
Cashier #2: I do not know what that word means.
Cashier #3: “Compensate?” You don't know what that means?
Cashier #2: “Compensate?” Penetrate–I know what *that* is.

Filene's Basement
Washington, DC

Teen boy: You know, I really appreciate you complimenting my baseball skills, but I really don’t appreciate you complimenting my boxer choices.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/305634992/but-theyre-just-so-nice.html

Overheard by: just trying to get to class…

Girl #1: I wish we had the same size feet.
Girl #2: Well, it's your fault.
Girl #1: How is it my fault? It's not like one day I woke up and was like, “yo Jesus, make my feet three sizes bigger than my sister's.”

Roosevelt Field
Long Island, New York

Overheard by: greg

Girl #1, about friend's makeup: This is definitely your color. Makes you look really classy.
Girl #2: Thanks!
Girl #1: Which is funny, because you're such a tramp.

Bus
Adelaide
Australia

Overheard by: plethora

Foreign language professor on first day of class (in Russian): By the end of this year, I will have you singing like Russian whores!

University of Memphis
Memphis, Tennessee

Theater professor: In Shakespeare's plays, SpongeBob would die.

Wayne State University
Detroit, Michigan

Native American girl: Yeah, when I was in kindergarten, I was the only Mexican in class. Well, except for Reema. She's Lebanese.

High School
San Diego, California

Girl sitting in front of lecture hall to professor, very matter-of-factly: People don't really use adverbs anymore.

Evans Hall, UC Berkeley
Berkeley, California

Overheard by: the only one left