You Ruined the Entire Experience Of Jerry Maguire for Me

American guy #1: Fuck, here I am, sitting on top of some fucking sandmountain in the goddam desert in Chile, god knows how far away from home, to watch some goddam sunset! And I'm not even on my fucking own, or with some hot chick. I'm sitting here with severeal hundred other people. It's such a fucking waste. It's kinda like sitting all alone in the movie theater, and then some dickhead comes and sits down next too you.
American guy #2: Yeah, I did that once!
American guy #1: I hate you. (walks away).

San Pedro de Attacama
Chile

Overheard by: Hege

Posted on August 2, 2018
Compare and contrast, Foreigners, Gripes, Guys, Insults, South America

But I've Thought About That, Too

Girl: Cara is so cute.
Guy: Yeah, she's adorable.
Girl: I mean, if I were a lesbian, I'd have sex with her.
Guy: I'm a little creeped out by that.
Girl: I mean, I've thought about it… (slight pause) I've never weighed myself!

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on July 31, 2018
Beauty, Bi-curious, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Default, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Massachusetts, Sexuality, Weirdness

But I'm Currently Putting David Hasselhoff Through a Rigorous Mentorship Program

Elderly Italian lady to store clerk, while judging jugs of wine: I'm the last of the great drinkers.

Liquor Store
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Steve

Posted on July 30, 2018
Compare and contrast, Default, Drinking & drunks, Foreigners, Old folks, Pennsylvania, Stores, Women, Words

Really Brought Down Property Values

Large black woman: They were the finest people on the block, but man, were their kids ugly!

Kohl's
Cherry Hill, New Jersey

Overheard by: Jyoshiki

Posted on July 25, 2018
Beauty, Black people, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Default, Kids, New Jersey, Women

Does It Make My Breasts Look Phoney?

Teen girl: Hey! This lip gloss matches my nipples! And my phone.

Galleria Mall
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Jo

Posted on July 19, 2018
Body parts, Cell phones, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Malls, Nevada, Nipples, Teens

We Know, Eminem.

30-something guy: I can't speak English, but my prose is fuckin' smooth.

Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: hb

Posted on July 14, 2018
Compare and contrast, Guys, Language barrier, Massachusetts

…Here Comes Another One

Teen girl: This skirt is so short! My legs are freezing!
Teen boy: Mine are fine.
Teen girl: That's because of your intense orgasms.
Teen boy: True.

Starbucks
Burlington, Vermont

Overheard by: Sweenan A. Mornstuy

Posted on July 9, 2018
Bars & Clubs, Body parts, Clothes, Clothing, Compare and contrast, Orgasm, Teens, Vermont

We Should Put the Top Up in the Boxster, Though

(it is raining extremely hard outside)
Gay guy #1: So wet. Whatever, I guess we can make this look work.
Gay guy #2: We totally can.

Outside Macy's
Burlington, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Emma W.

Posted on July 8, 2018
Clothes, Compare and contrast, Default, Fashion, Massachusetts, Queers, Stores, Weather

Eating Dirt Is Also Off-Limits

Girl #1, talking about Lasik surgery: Well, they either cut your eye completely with a laser, or they do part of it surgically.
Girl #2: No! No! Stop. I can't talk about eyes. Don't talk about eyes, especially when I'm eating.
Guy: This is just like with my friend, Marise. We can't talk about killing people because she's from Haiti.

Arlington, Virginia

Overheard by: Molly

Posted on July 6, 2018
Body parts, Compare and contrast, Default, Food, Geography, Girls, Guys, Violence, Virginia

Yet You Divorced Your Third Husband for Peeing in Your Shoes?

Woman on cell: I've been through many husbands, but the dog has been with me for 14 years! Men can be replaced but the dog stays!

Bellingham, Washington

Overheard by: sara

Posted on July 3, 2018
Animals, Compare and contrast, Feelings, On the phone, Relationships, Time Management, Washington, Women

Compare and contrast