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30-something male drunk: You're not my mother!
20-something female drunk: I'm not your mother. I'm just telling you that it's not okay to grunt and lunge at people.

Pacifica, California

Overheard by: Slightly

Mom: No! Don't walk on that! (kid continues to walk on grass) I hope you step in dog shit.

Capitol Hill
Washington, DC

Overheard by: christa

Library worker #1: Do I have to lick it?
Library worker #2: … What?
Library worker #1: The envelope. Do I have to lick it?
Library worker #2: You could tape it, I guess…
Library worker #1: Great, because after last night, I am totally out of saliva.

Main Library, Kent State University
Kent, Ohio

Girl: Oh, as far as I’m concerned, they’re just the happy little worker bees that bring me my birth control.

Madison, Wisconsin

CPR class instructor: So when they sent the babies to us, they forgot to include the faces…

University of Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Zach

Psychology professor, discussing babies: If this thing didn't smile, it would be in the trash.

Rutgers University
New Brunswick, New Jersey

Property professor: They’re only on the land about 25 days a year, and they get full possession? ‘What the fuck?!’ as they say!

http://overheardinlawschool.blogspot.com/

Overheard by: sa

Female student #1, whispering: I got my nipples pierced.
Female student #2: All 17 nipples?

Illinois

Overheard by: Tyler

Guy: I saw some midgets wrestling last night. I felt really bad. Why would they do that?

Point Park University
Pittsburgh, PA

Overheard by: ZB

Nerdy teen #1: So you just sort of put your hands down her pants and rub up behind her.
Nerdy teen #2 (nodding): Yeah. I know what you mean.

Vancouver
Canadia

Overheard by: iloveholidays