Nanny to five-year-old: Look, Stephen, there's a kitty!
Stephen, petting cat: Since boys have short hair and girls have long hair, then this kitty is a boy.
Nanny: Maybe not. Boys can have long hair and girls can have short hair too.
Stephen: Then how do you tell if it's a girl or a boy?
Nanny: How 'bout some ice cream?
Washington, DC
Serious college boy to friend: I was too busy to wipe my ass this morning.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/397614032/ill-be-in-the-other-room.html
Overheard by: but you weren't too busy for the preceding action?
American guy carrying cake box: And the 911 operator just hears “you fucking whore!” and the line goes dead. Seven hours later, the cops show up.
Incredulous Asian girl: And they were all dead?
American guy: Oh yeah, all of 'em were dead. That's why you're much better off being middle class in this country, health-wise.
London
England
Overheard by: Jai
Blonde Vanderbilt freshman: It literally was, like, the best essay I've ever written. I mean, it was awesome. My mom helped me a lot.
Nashville, Tennessee
Hipster girl to friend, looking at DVDs: Hey, you know my friend Stephanie, whose boyfriend I made out with, Corey? His favorite movie was A Walk to Remember. He admitted it and everything.
Hipster friend, touching hipster friend's head: You have a really soft scalp.
Hipster girl: That means I'll never lose my hair. Oh! The Breakfast Club!
Edgewood Target
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: I didn't make out with him
Blonde American student: For some reason, when I get high I get paranoid that everyone around me is jerking off!
University of London
England
Overheard by: The Friend
Midshipman: It's midgets, sir.
Skeptical lieutenant: Is it like albino midgets or something?
Midshipman: No, sir, regular midgets.
Skeptical lieutenant: Oh well…okay, then.
NROTC Classroom
Atlanta, Georgia
Rich girl: After 25 you might as well just die. If I'm not married by the time I'm 25, I'm having a boob job, a nose job and a face lift.
Leeds
England
Tall brunette: Hey…have you seen my portable soup transporter?
Short blonde (in disbelief): You mean a cup?
Tall brunette: Yeah…that.
Lower Hutt
New Zealand
Overheard by: Seriously worried
Zookeeper: We have three types of penguins: Humboldt, Emperor, and Macaroni.
Small child watching zookeeper: Are there African American penguins?
Zookeeper, clearly flustered: Er…well…there are penguins from many countries and continents…
Milwaukee County Zoo
Wisconsin
Overheard by: Not a penguin racist
