Woman on iPhone: Well, he was doing squats, so I didn't think it was inappropriate to stare at his ass.
Trader Joe's
Campbell, California
Woman on iPhone: Well, he was doing squats, so I didn't think it was inappropriate to stare at his ass.
Trader Joe's
Campbell, California
Trophy wife, very sincerely: I think that in a past life…I was Ralph Nader.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: lauren mcgoldrick
Girl #1: Hey! I still have your bra from the other night. (takes bra out of her bag and hands it over)
Girl #2: Oh yeah, thanks! Wait, it has bumps in it! It didn't have bumps in it before!
Girl #1: Yeah, I wore it. It was cleaner than mine.
Girl #2: Huh?
Girl #1: Uh…no, of course I didn't wear it!
Girl #2: Well, someone did. With bumpy boobs. It didn't have bumps before.
Queen Street Mall
Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: uh-huh
Nigerian man to wife loading small children into overcrowded rental van: Come, we are in America now! We go home and eat cheese!
Rosicrucian Museum
San Jose, California
Middle aged woman: Can I get a cheeseburger, without the cheese?
Burger King
Dansville, New York
Pessimistic non-racist : I can't remember what Jamal Lewis did to go to prison for, but when he got out, he was a different running back.
Optimistic racist: I'm sure it was some kind of misunderstanding.
Point Comfort, Texas
Dude #1: So did you fuck that chick after we left the other night?
Dude #2 (glancing around to make sure no one's listening): Yeah.
Dude #1: Yes! I knew it!
Dude #2: Dude, I didn't even know what was going on until I came outta my blackout, and realized I was balls deep.
Dude #1: Condom?
Dude #2: (shakes head)
Dude #1: Yes!
Toons Bar
Chicago, Illinois
Girl to friend wearing a short skirt: Ooooooh girl, if you bend over I could see all your discharge!
Ikea Parking Lot
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: The Rex
Counselor: What do you need Legos for?
Nine-year-old boy: To make weaponry!
Center for Autism and Emotional Support
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Supermarket cashier: I only use Charmin toilet paper; if a place doesn't have it, I bring my own.
Customer: Wow, you're picky.
Supermarket cashier: I'm picky about my men too; they have to have all of their teeth.
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