Counselor: What do you need Legos for?
Nine-year-old boy: To make weaponry!
Center for Autism and Emotional Support
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Counselor: What do you need Legos for?
Nine-year-old boy: To make weaponry!
Center for Autism and Emotional Support
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Supermarket cashier: I only use Charmin toilet paper; if a place doesn't have it, I bring my own.
Customer: Wow, you're picky.
Supermarket cashier: I'm picky about my men too; they have to have all of their teeth.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Little boy hitting trash can: I demand this trash can to give me money!
Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium
Tacoma, Washington
Guy to friend: So she broke her vibrator for the third time?
Mystic Lake Casino
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Teen #1: I stuck my ass in her face and she choked on her broccoli.
(dog coughs)
Teen #2: Your ass is making everyone choke!
Harrison, Michigan
Overheard by: Lauren
Pompous guy: The karmic wrong done to me that day was absorbed by the jacket!
Fremont
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Mickity Mike
Drunk woman #1: I shoulda been in the mafia.
Drunk woman #2: Why?
Drunk woman #1: I hate loose ends.
Bar
Louisiana
Overheard by: soprano
Guy #1, walking down sidewalk: I really have to poo.
Guy #2, walking down sidewalk: Speaking of poo, I could use some poontang.
Random girl walking the other way: Oh my goodness!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Alexa
Wrestler's mom: You need to stop flirting with all of those girls.
Wrestler: But mom, she came up to me, and was hitting on me, and said she wanted to have sex with me.
Varsity Wrestling Meet
Buchanan, Michigan
Overheard by: Katie
Socially awkward math professor: And now I will attempt to get the same solution using method #2, and if I don't get the same answer, I'm just going to go slit my wrists. (writes on the board for a few minutes, gets a different answer) Well, shit.
University of New Brunswick
New Brunswick
Canadia
Overheard by: yeah, multivariable calculus does that to me, to
