Tipsy guy to friend: Of course I have a nickname for my penis. I call it “the octagon.”
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Sick Fatty
Drunk man to another: I don't know if I should get a sandwich or a fucking whore…
Chicago, Illinois
Middle aged drunk white lady, seriously: Dude, where's my car?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/363293196/its-just-so-sad.html
Overheard by: unicorn lover
Hungover girl: Oh my god! Look at my hair, it's a mess! I look like a horse's vagina!
Flight above London
England
Barely legal drunk blonde: Oh my god, I just walked into the guys' washroom. There were guys at the urinals!
Barely legal drunk brunette: It's okay, you were just breaking down gender dichotomies.
Karaoke Bar
Canadia
Overheard by: Tiffany
Drunk guy: I'm so happy I'm a guy. I don't have to wipe after I pee.
Tipsy girl: You should really wipe if you want Lisa* to suck your dick.
Bayonne, New Jersey
Drunk boy, about text message: That doesn't say anything.
Drunk girl: Yes, it does. It says, “hey, what's up?”
Drunk boy: No, it doesn't.
Drunk girl to sober girl: Does this say, “hey, what's up?”
Sober girl: No. It says, “al aloof ah.”
Brantford
Ontario
Canadia
Drunk girl: I thought the first time I had sex it would be like milking a cow. You know: squirt, squirt, squirt… a little at a time.
Kingston
Ontario
Canadia
Drunk young girl: Whatever. She could have had sex whenever she wanted.
Drunk mother: Well, she's beat you by a few years!
Drunk grandmother: I haven't had sex in such a long time.
The Keg
Vancouver
Canadia
Drunk tailgater dude: Remember when you paid for that girl I fell in love with?
The Rose Bowl
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: Chad
