Feelings

Old lady to another: Mary started crying because she thought they were taking her back to New Jersey.

Pizza Shop
Lima, Pennsylvania

Girl: I feel rather drunk at this conjuncture!

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Claire

Angry woman on cell: I want the fucking muffins!

Galleria Mall
Poughkeepsie, New York

Overheard by: Russ

Girl to friends: I thought I was playing hard to get, but it turns out I was playing “I hate you”.

Elon University
Elon, North Carolina

Artsy emo: It was like lesbian Fight Club! First Leema liked Holly, then she liked Tracy, who liked Nicola, who also liked Holly. So Nicola and Leema got in a fist fight and in the end, Tracy and Holly had sex in the woodshop classroom!

Toronto
Canadia

Professor: You don't want to have a thin-skinned Prime Minister who's afraid of puffin poo.

University of Ottawa
Canadia

College guy: I like salsa, but it makes me sad.

Duluth, Minnesota

Overheard by: Nic

20-something blonde: It's just…she can't talk, all she does is scream and cry. She's not even a real person yet. I just don't understand how you can love her so much!
Redhead, lovingly cradling baby: Shit, hon, you have to stop saying things like that. She's your daughter!

Café Nero
London
England

Overheard by: Nit

Girl: Do you ever get the feeling we're, like, related to monkeys?

Bryn Mawr College
Pennsylvania

White tourist: I’m really sorry — I don’t have any change. If I did, I’d give you some, but I don’t, so… sorry. Good luck with everything…
Black dude: Cracka, I’m ain’t homeless!

Hynes Convention Center subway stop
Boston, Massachusetts