Friends

Private school girl: Did I tell you what Jane* asked me?
Best friend: No.
Private school girl: She was all like, ‘Did you hook up with a homeless guy?’ and I was all like, ‘No, of course not! Never say that again!’
Best friend, laughing hard: I can’t believe you did that!
Private school girl: What, hooked up with a homeless guy? It’s not a big deal.

Haight Street
San Francisco, California

20-something hipster to friend: So…I'm officially out of corpses.
Friend: Dude!

Portland, Maine

Boy: Have you seen Rainman?
Friend: Nah.
Boy: Ohmigod, I can't believe you haven't seen Rainman! I mean I haven't seen Rainmanbut I can't believe you haven't seen Rainman!

Newcastle-Sydney Train
Australia

Girl #1: I’m all freaked out now! I bet you she’s pregnant! My sister’s pregnant!
Girl #2: I’m sure she’s not pregnant, you’re assuming the worst.
Girl #1: Oh my god! What if she has testicle cancer?!

Adelaide
Australia

Overheard by: monkey

Creepy lurky guy at bar (walking up and smelling girl sitting at table): Sorry y'all. Just smells really good.
Friend of girl (giving guy a dirty look): That was awkward.
Creepy lurky guy: Well, maybe you shouldn't be here then.
Friend of girl: Well, maybe you shouldn't be trying to smell us.

Blue Martini
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Ariola

Guy: Hey, you coming to my place? Allison wants someone to hang with who doesn’t have a penis.
Girl: Yeah, I’m coming, but I’m not sure if I fit those criteria…
Guy: Now I’m scared…
Girl: She thinks she’s getting a friend to girly-chat with, but she may just be getting an ear full of cock.

Hobart, Tasmania
Australia

Black teen girl to friend: He was like “you're so high you don't even know what to do!” and I was like “nigga, this ain't the first time I smoked!”

Columbus, Ohio

Overheard by: Hancock

Thuggish teen to friends: Yeah, I’m going antiquing this weekend. For at least an hour.

Orange Line Train
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Julianna

Girl, walking across campus with friends: I think two beers and a shot is the perfect amount for that class!

University of Arizona

College girl: I really want to go as Superman!
Friend: You aren't going to stuff your crotch, are you?

Melbourne University
Australia