Guys

Man to bundled up girl who sat down ten minutes before: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You're a lady? I mean, when you sat down, I totally thought you were a man. I can see you're a lady now, but I could've sworn…
Girl: Uhmmm… Yeah, thanks.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/417247758/i-can-see-how-a-scarf-would-confuse-you.html

Overheard by: Ian

Asian guy #1: She's the kind of woman who stands to the side, but she's also the kind of woman who talks shit behind your back.
Asian guy #2: Yeah, traditional Asian bitch.

UCSD
San Diego, California

Guy at computer: It’s this whole thing with the penguins, man…
Friend: Yeah, I know. It’ll work itself out, though.

Monash University
Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Timothy

Girlfriend, excited: I know exactly what I'm going to get you for your birthday this year.
Boyfriend: Oh yeah? I know exactly what I am going to get you for your birthday.
Girlfriend: Really? Are you going to get that thing cut off your back?

Cafe
Sydney
Australia

Girl #1: So my computer is dead, and I don't know how to fix it.
Girl #2: What do you think is wrong with it?
Girl #1: It's got a virus. But it was totally worth it.
Girl #2: Oh, yeah? Why?
Girl #1: Well, Mary* and I were curious and wanted to know if midgets' dicks are normal-sized or midget-sized, so we were looking up midget porn.
Girl #2: And the verdict is?
Girl #1: They're normal-sized. This one guy was seriously a tripod. It's incredible.
Male bartender: Yeah, I can see how that would be worth a completely devastating virus on your computer. Can you write down the website you found it on?

Killarney's Pub
Hamilton, New Jersey

Overheard by: Currrly!

Frazzled mother: At Michigan State they don't even have parties. They're not going to want you at a party. You are not going to a party. There is no chance.
Hopeful twelve-year-old boy: Oh, there's a chance.

East Lansing, Michigan

Overheard by: Cameron

Dad to son, passing Valentine's Day t-shirt display: These are kind of nice for your mom, no?
Son: It's for mom, what do I care?

City Center Mall
White Plains, New York

Overheard by: Nathan

Guy to another: Don't shake my hand, dude, it's still got pussy on it!

Men's Bathroom
Bar, Alabama

Overheard by: So glad I don't live here anymore

Girl: But I showered for you this morning!
Boyfriend: So you don't want to go?
Girl: I didn't say that, but you made me get cleaned up this morning, and now I'm just going to get dirty. You better pay my water bill, for all these showers you make me take.

Quiznos
Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Believes in no-strings-attached hygene

Drunk guy outside window: I didn't storm the beaches of Normandy so you could fly around on pieces of wood!

Montague Street
Glasgow
Scotland

Overheard by: sarah (trying to sleep here!)