Suit #1: Yeah mate, it was fucking wild…
Suit #2: Oh yeah?
Suit #1: Yeah, took her back to mine. She's a skank. I swear there were spiders crawling out of her vag.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Suit #1: Yeah mate, it was fucking wild…
Suit #2: Oh yeah?
Suit #1: Yeah, took her back to mine. She's a skank. I swear there were spiders crawling out of her vag.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Mom to teenage daughter: Yeah, they swell up big, you shoulda seen it, looked like I had a pussy on my hand.
Courtroom
Houston, Texas
Father: My kid broke his face today. He tried to do a back flip and kneed himself in the eye.
Friend: It’s fine. Kids are like lizards — they grow stuff back.
Liberty Mutual
Boston, Massachusetts
Woman #1: How's your health?
Woman #2: Oh, starting to get better. I'm okay.
Woman #1: Our cat is sick. We had to bring her to the vet.
Los Angeles, California
Scruffy ponytail dude on cell: Is the dog oozing or pulsing? Tell your brother to stop squeezing the guinea pig, I can hear it squealing! (pause) Yes I can! Yes I can, Ruth*! (pause) Oh, sorry, I guess grandma sneezing does sound like the guinea pig… Just wrap the dog in a towel and I'll be home in an hour.
Tampa, Florida
Elderly woman #1: How's your mother?
Elderly woman #2: She's great! She wants to get euthanized!
Chappaqua, New York
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad, changing his diaper: I hear ya.
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad: Uh huh.
Tourist baby: Bah bah bah bah!
Tourist dad: I told you not to mess with those guys.
(tourist baby laughs)
Tourist dad: Yeah, you know what I'm talking about!
Restroom, Walt Disney World
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: The Normie in the Handistall
Chick: No, if I take a shit I get the dish soap.
Guy: [nods understandingly].
George Washington University
Washington, DC
Man in bathroom on cell: Hang on a sec, I am going someplace quieter. (a few seconds later) Damn, hang on. I just peed on my hand.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/443767925/nobody-saw-that-coming.html
Overheard by: did they know you were in the bathroom? Ewww.
Little girl washing hands: Look, mommy, electric soap!
Women's Restroom
Salt Lake City International Airport, Utah
