20-something guy: My testicles are perfect!
Friends: [Silence.]50-something lady walking past: [Snicker.]
Cork
Ireland
Overheard by: sarah
20-something guy: My testicles are perfect!
Friends: [Silence.]50-something lady walking past: [Snicker.]
Cork
Ireland
Overheard by: sarah
Science professor: This is plastic deformation, like what happens to those baby-seal catchers. You know, the plastic that comes around soda cans? Sometimes you catch penguins too, but those are much harder–they run really fast, and they have no regard for their bodies. They just throw themselves off cliffs.
Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts
Weird emo girl: I've still got bruises from the first time she hit me with a wheelbarrow!
Bridgwater College
Somerset
England
Bartender #1: Yeah, so I had this weird shit comin' outta my dick. It was sick, dude. Like this funky green pus-like shit oozing from the tip. Smelled like shit, too.
Bartender #2: Dude, you need to quit boning so many filthy whores. You're like rotting from the inside.
Bartender #1: Shit, man, I don't give a fuck. As long as I keep gettin' laid.
Bartender #2: You ain't gonna be doin' shit if your fuckin' nasty dick falls off.
Bartender #1: I know, right? This last chick I nailed was a total slut. I pulled down my pants and she could smell whatever's up with my cock. She goes “Ew, what stinks? Is that your dick?” And I go, “No, it's my feet, I swear!” Then I just pulled her towards me and shoved it in. It was awesome.
Bartender #2: Fuck, man. Something's definitely wrong with you.
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Overheard by: Nasty Nate
Teen to another: Man, there's DNA all over the streets!
http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2007/08/overheard-near-crocker-galleria-but.html
Overheard by: jessica
Teen girl: Being around you makes me want to talk about my bowel movements.
La Capilla
Torrance, California
Overheard by: J-dawg.
Suit #1: Yeah mate, it was fucking wild…
Suit #2: Oh yeah?
Suit #1: Yeah, took her back to mine. She's a skank. I swear there were spiders crawling out of her vag.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Mom to teenage daughter: Yeah, they swell up big, you shoulda seen it, looked like I had a pussy on my hand.
Courtroom
Houston, Texas
Father: My kid broke his face today. He tried to do a back flip and kneed himself in the eye.
Friend: It’s fine. Kids are like lizards — they grow stuff back.
Liberty Mutual
Boston, Massachusetts
Woman #1: How's your health?
Woman #2: Oh, starting to get better. I'm okay.
Woman #1: Our cat is sick. We had to bring her to the vet.
Los Angeles, California
