White-haired 60-something lady on cell: I can't live there anymore. (pause) No, it's not that. She's trying to force her Scientology on me. (pause) Oh, you didn't know? Yeah, she's not a lesbian anymore. She joined Scientology to change her from being lesbian. (pause) They made her lesbian side go away.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Woman on cell: So I told him to quit being a titty and put it in the backseat.
Amarillo, Texas
Overheard by: Flossy Jossie
Man talking loudly on cell: Hey, I heard you have a threesome set up for Saturday! (pauses) Would it be alright if I joined?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/345062915/its-just-going-to-throw-off-the-threesome-dynamic.html
Overheard by: I hope he is referring to golf
Woman on cell: Slowly… over the next week… add a fruit.
Barnes & Noble
St. Louis, Missouri
Guy on cell: Hey! What are you doing? Having a good time? … You have a small cooter — why else would you be having fun?!
Chiswick Road and Commonwealth Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Beantown Babe
Chick on cell phone: My roommate was rolling a lint roller all over her head for like ten minutes and finally I was like: “What the fuck are you doing? You’re gonna pull all your hair out!” … Haha yeah… She threatened to kill me if I asked her anymore questions… She probably watches me sleep.
UB Bus
Buffalo, New York
Guy on cell: I'll buy you an infinite beer!
UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Girl on phone: So, we had this bet that if the Patriots won, we were going to break up, so we were both hoping for that. But that didn’t happen, so now we’re just kind of stuck together.
Seattle, Washington
Guy on cell: I got a face full of botulism! Look at me — I’m sexy!
New Jersey
Nonchalant dude on cell: My parents are dead, okay? Everyone’s dead, okay?
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Passing easily amused person
