Teen girl: Hey guys! I heard there's going to be like, a digital Armageddon today!
Teen boy: I think that's a hoax.
Teen girl: No, but I heard it on the radio (pause) They wouldn't have reported it like that if it was fake.
Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: H. G. Wells
Man in stall on cell: Hey! It's me, do you want to talk dirty? (pause) Oh, okay. I'll let you watch your show.
Coral Springs, Florida
Businessman on cell: I could barely see over her head, dude! It was like reading Klingon for the first time.
Independence Avenue
Washington, DC
Guy picking up copy of Les Miserables: Oh my god, look at the size of this thing! What a crappy book!
Barnes & Noble
Mankato, Minnesota
Asian girl, holding out fist: Pound it?
Queer: Do I look like someone who pounds it?
Asian girl, giggling: Ummmm…
West Lafayette, Indiana
Overheard by: Kole
Student: I agree with everything Bill O'Reilly says.
University of Toronto
Canadia
Flamboyant Starbucks supervisor: I call Princess Peach!
Amused female employee #1: Be gayer, dude.
Flamboyant Starbucks supervisor: That was it. I don't think I can get any gayer.
Amused female employee #2: Yeah, he just plateaued.
Ottawa
Canadia
Guy to friend: So I said to him, “you wanna be a clown and you don't even know who fucking Bozo is?!”
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: phuqmonkey
Persian princess: That's why I really want to be into journalism. I think that being somewhere where there's, like, a tsunami or earthquake is really exciting to me…
Horny first date: Yeah, yeah…
Persian princess (breathy pause): I guess I just really want to work for MTV.
Santana Row
San Jose, California
Overheard by: Demitra
Woman: I think I have superpowers.
Lawrenceville, New Jersey
Overheard by: Anna
