Do You Do, Uh, Blown Glass?

Old Polish lady, bitching about price of handmade jewelry: So you're paying for the hand job and not the stone?

Bethlehem, Pennsylvania

Posted on July 20, 2009
Clients, Jobs & Careers, Money, Pennsylvania, Questions, Women

Presenting, the Deepest Person at Banana Republic.

Aspiring fashionista: What if I die today and regret that I never dressed up all the time? But if I worked at Banana Republic, I'd be forced to dress up.

BART Train
Berkeley, California

Overheard by: Kaitlen

Posted on July 19, 2009
California, Clothes, Death & dying, Fashion, Idiots, Jobs & Careers, Questions, Stupidity, Train

Then Where Are the Coconuts, Brainiac?

Tourist to park ranger: How do I get to Mt. Desert Island from here?
Park ranger: Ummm, you're standing on it.
Tourist: No, I'm not.
Park ranger: Yes, you are.
Tourist: This is ridiculous, I'm going to report you to the government.
Park ranger: No, really, you're on the island.

Mount Desert Island, Maine

Posted on July 19, 2009
Employees, Geography, Maine, Questions, Threats, Tourists

Religious Freedom's Expensive

Teacher: Why did the Pilgrims come to America?
Student: Because they wanted to dig for gold!
(later)
Teacher: Why did the Puritans come to America?
Student: Oh! I know this one! They're the ones that wanted to dig for gold!

East Greenbush, New York

Posted on July 18, 2009
Education, History, New York, Questions, Students, Stupidity, Teachers, Wishes

The Text Wouldn't All Fit.

Nerd #1 to another: How do you write “dd” in hexadecimal again? I forget…
(they turn to look at fat woman walking by)
Nerd #2: I would not write a dissertation on her boobs. No way.

PATH Train
Hoboken, New Jersey

Overheard by: I wouldn't either

Posted on July 18, 2009
Idiots, New Jersey, Questions, Rack, Science, Train, Words

From Stephen King's The Passion Of Christine

Little girl: Where is Jesus?
Bored babysitter: Umm, I don't know… In your heart?
Little girl: Well, then guess what?
Bored babysitter: What?
Little girl: I'm going to punch him! (starts punching herself in the heart)

Toronto
Canadia

Posted on July 18, 2009
Babysitters, Body parts, Canadia, Feelings, Jesus, Kids, Questions, Violence

That They Transport Illegally in Their Quilts?

Student: So wait, the Amish have, like, all natural steroids?

Tempe, Arizona

Overheard by: J.

Posted on July 17, 2009
Arizona, Health & Hygiene, Questions, Religion, Students

Lindsay Lohan's Bedside Table?

Lady, looking bewildered at companion: Well, where would you be if you were a sex book?

Bookstore
Birmingham, Alabama

Overheard by: Knows exactly where he would be

Posted on July 15, 2009
Alabama, Books, Questions, Sex, Stores, Women

AndNone Of Your Trickery Is Going to Get Me to Admit That We Do

Patron: Double cheeseburger and small fries, please.
Counter boy: We don't have small fries.
Patron: What sizes do you have?
Counter boy: Medium, large and extra large.
Patron: Which size is the smallest?
Counter boy: Medium is the smallest.
Patron: Fine. I'll take the smallest, then.
Counter boy: We don't have small fries.

McDonald's
Bloomington, Indianapolis

Posted on July 14, 2009
Clients, Employees, Food, Indiana, Offers and requests, Questions, Stupidity

Nobody Who's Been to England Ever Has to Ask

Pretty tween girl, looking around on busy street: What's with all these ugly people taking up all the space?

Toronto
Canadia

Posted on July 13, 2009
Beauty, Canadia, Compare and contrast, Questions, Tweens

Questions