Questions

Professor: So my kid walked in on us last night…
Student in class: Well, you gave them the talk, why not say you were wrestling or something?
Professor: Well, I have no way to explain the handcuffs.

Penn State
Altoona, Pennsylvania

Blonde: Did you sleep with him?
Brunette: (nods)
Blonde: What!? But you're my virgin friend!
Brunette: I can pretend…

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: The Shrew

Frat guy #1: Dude, what is wrong with you tonight? You were all fidgety in there!
Frat guy #2: Yeah… You remember that blonde chick? She gave me syphilis, man. It's itchy as fuck!

Arizona State University

Overheard by: Just pretend like you didn't hear that…

Very drunk male friend to very sober, pregnant, married friend: Can I phlegm on your cleavage?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/375684186/that-just-wont-work.html

Overheard by: a connoisseur of terrible pick-up lines

Trixy McBimbo: Is “artillery” another word for money?

Loyola University
Chicago, Illinois

Student #1: So you're only taking three credit hours this semester?
Student #2: Yeah. I figure as long as I take at least one class, I can live at home and mooch off of my mother indefinitely.
Student #1: You dreamed it, saw it and are going for it. Awesome, dude.

UCF
Orlando, Florida

Boy: I wonder if I can have sex with a hedgehog…

Essex
England

Overheard by: Anthony Mercer

Seven-year-old girl: Daddy, do you know what stinks ?
Dad: No, what?
Seven-year-old girl: Dog farts.
Dad: Let's not talk about that here.

TJ Maxx
Ann Arbor, Michigan

Overheard by: A.Taylor

Girl #1: Hey.
Girl #2: Hey, what's wrong?
Girl #1: I fucked someone.
Girl #2: I fucked someone too. Let's get a coffee.

Bookstore
Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Jaclyn

Indian guy: Dude…what if Shakespeare was Jesus?

Bellingham, Washington