Questions

Cashier #1: He's definitely overcompensating for something.
Cashier #2: I do not know what that word means.
Cashier #3: “Compensate?” You don't know what that means?
Cashier #2: “Compensate?” Penetrate–I know what *that* is.

Filene's Basement
Washington, DC

Drunk girl: I teach! I teach AP bio kids. They ask so many smart questions. (thoughtful pause) I make things up all the time.
Friend: You make things up??
Drunk girl: I just say “according to my research.” (shrugs, laughs hysterically)

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Woman to friend buying panties: So, are you sure these aren't the ones that will give you cameltoe?

Peoria, Arizona

Overheard by: Giggling cashier

Preschool teacher #1: I wouldn't want to spill coffee on those shoes.
Preschool teacher #2: Why not?
Preschool teacher #1: Because they'd get coffee stains on them.

Rumson, New Jersey

Lost woman: Excuse me, can you tell me what state I’m in?

Mall of America
Bloomington, Minnesota

Overheard by: ugh…tourists

Guy #1: Dude, I wonder how Orville Redenbacher is still in all those commercials when he's been dead for, like, a bazillion years?
Guy #2: Maybe he's a zombie.
Guy #1: Or a robot.
Guy #3: Or a zombie robot.
Guy #1: Seriously, dude. I think you've been reading too much sci-fi.

Bellingham, Washington

Blonde student to astronomy professor: Can you tell me approximately how many stars there are in our solar system?

Wheaton College
Wheaton, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Amycakes

Girl #1: You look like you had a wild weekend!
Girl #2: Yeah, I'm so sore I can barely walk…
Girl #1: So who all was there?
Girl #2: Oh, you know: Dillon, Chad, Mike, my dad, my mom…

University of Virginia

Little boy intently popping bubble wrap: Why must you be so preoccupying? Why?!

Vancouver
Canadia

Dude #1: Hey man, wanna go get some things pregnant?
Dude #2: Um. What? What kind of things?
Dude #1: Just stuff. Whatever we find.

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