Shopping

I Thought That Was Only Possible in Thailand?

Professor: Here, let me make you some flesh. You know, you can buy flesh in the school store!

Maryland Institute College of Art
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Painting with Mr. Lector

Posted on December 2, 2009
Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Maryland, Shopping, Teachers, Weirdness

What Will Thailand Think Of Next?

Dude on phone: You have a post-coital gift shop?!

College Campus
Denver, Colorado

Posted on November 29, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Colorado, Gifts, Guys, On the phone, Questions, Sex, Shopping, Weirdness

One Word About V-Neck Tees and I Will Slit Your Throat

Girl #1: Hey, let's go to The Gap, they have short pants there.
Girl #2, pissed off: Shut the fuck up! I hate you.

Mall
Northern New Jersey

Posted on November 22, 2009
Clothes, Clothing, Girls, Gripes, Insults, Malls, New Jersey, Shopping

The Hot Salesgirl

Whiny man: I don't even know how to read. Why are we here?

Borders
California

Posted on October 30, 2009
Books, California, Guys, Questions, Shopping, Stores, Stupidity

Like, One Containing a Central Venous Line

Middle-aged rich bitch on cell: I'll pay up to $300 for a hat I can't live without, you know?

Washington, DC

Posted on September 7, 2009
Biotechs, Clothes, Clothing, Money, On the phone, Shopping, Washington, DC

Sometimes I Like to Playfully Snap My Own Strap!

Girl browsing underwear section: I love this bra–you'd wear it just to play with yourself, you know?

Wiltshire
England

Overheard by: J

Posted on August 20, 2009
Clothes, England, Girls, Masturbation, Shopping, Undies

Martha Stewart: “It's a Good Thing.”

Dominatrix: The best s&m tool of all time is the Williams Sonoma Spoontula.

Good Vibrations
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Ladle

Posted on August 13, 2009
Compare and contrast, Kink, San Francisco, Shopping, Women

Next Step: Getting Rid Of This Mullet

Woman #1, watching hobo in a dress: You know, I finally feel like I'm a metropolitan woman.
Woman #2: Why? Gotten used to the traffic, crowds, pollution and public transportation?
Woman #1: Well, yeah, but that's not why. See that guy in that dress over there? When I first came to the city, I would have been amused or shocked to see something like that. Now, my first reaction is: “Those shoes and socks don't go with that dress–and Macy's isn't that far away. Dude, go get some pumps!” I mean, how often do you think I would have thought to say “dude, go get some pumps” when I was still living in Ohio? I'm living the dream!

Financial District
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: And the jacket didn't match either

Posted on July 27, 2009
Clothes, Clothing, Questions, San Francisco, Shoes, Shopping, Stupidity, Women

Raise Your Hand If You Share His Irrational Love Of Costco

Random male shopper: We're looking at meat accessories!

Costco
Raleigh, North Carolina

Overheard by: Anna

Posted on July 10, 2009
Clients, Food, North Carolina, Shopping, Stores

The Doctor Said You Border on Mumu Fat.

Woman: You should shop at Lane Bryant!
Girl: Mom, that's a fat girls store!
Woman: I shopped there when I was 17, and you're much fatter that I was!

Hendersonville, Tennessee

Overheard by: Tanner

Posted on May 29, 2009
Advice, Age and ageing, Compare and contrast, Default, Family ties, Girls, Shopping, Tennessee, Women