Time Management

20-something guy: Dude, I have been waiting four to five years for this boner.

Medford, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Neme

Girl: Yeah, but he has a really nice penis. I like to play with it while we watch movies.

overheardattcnj.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Overheard at TCNJ

Guy in tire store uniform: I don't have time to walk through this whole store. Just point me to the scooters and the black barbies.

Toys “R” Us
St. Petersburg, Florida

Overheard by: got got got no time either

Conductor: Welcome aboard to all the new passengers. The time is 9:11. Actually… Let’s make that 9:12. That’s better, isn’t it?

Washington, DC

Teen girl #1: I think we need to get her a rebound guy.
Teen girl #2: Don't you think it's a bit soon? Paul died like two weeks ago.
Teen girl #1: Hmm. I guess. (pause) Maybe just for weekends then?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, okay.

Bus Stop
Brisbane
Australia

Overheard by: cara

Tube train announcer: We're just waiting for a platform to come free at the next station. Thank you for your patience.
Small boy, thoughtfully: They don't *know* that we're being patient. We could all be banging on the windows and screaming.

Tube
London
England

Overheard by: Matt W

Taxi dispatcher: Yeah, take your time. No need to kill yourself.
Taxi driver: One more reason not to kill myself. Copy.

Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: Claiborne

20-something suit: They act like they are advancing and getting ahead just because they are always on time. I said “whatever, I'm still cooler than you.”

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: An overachiever

Fun date #1: I hate it when guys want to cum on your face every time.
Fun date #2: Yeah, it gets in your eyes.
Fun date #1: And in your hair.
Fun date #3: Once in a while is okay, but not every time.

Outside Coffee Shop
Harrisonburg, Virginia

Overheard by: browny

Ghetto girl on phone, angrily: Yeah, well, I bet he's just lollygagging somewhere with his grandma!

22 Bus
Boston, Massachusetts