Dude: Just because I watched you out a window for an hour doesn’t mean I’m creepy.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Dude: Just because I watched you out a window for an hour doesn’t mean I’m creepy.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Guy: I saw some midgets wrestling last night. I felt really bad. Why would they do that?
Point Park University
Pittsburgh, PA
Overheard by: ZB
Guy: I was really pissed off. Then you bit me on the shoulder. Three times.
Girl: (laughs hysterically)
DePaul University
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: University Peon
Skinny girl: My roommate’s nuts. We got into another fight.
Tall girl: Oh, God, what is it now? She’s mad again ’cause you don’t rinse every drop of toothpaste out of the sink, right?
Skinny girl: No, it’s the mayonnaise! The fucking mayonnaise! She accused me of eating it! Just the plain mayo, not on a sandwich or anything. I looked at her and told her, ‘Listen, bitch, I don’t eat mayo. I’m anorexic.’ She’s accusing me of having no self control!
Tall girl: So, what happened then?
Skinny girl: I was drunk, so I threw the mayo out our front door and said, ‘Ha! Now no one can eat it!’ I don’t think that helped the situation at all.
George Herman’s
Charlotte, North Carolina
Girl #1: What? Did he think I was going to let him have sex with me?
Girl #2: Or choke you?
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/05/sent-in-april-3.html
Overheard by: Marty
Fat black woman on cell: Black women are better than white women, because you can beat the shit out of them and the bruises won’t be visible!
BART train
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: Gilatron
Hungover girl #1: I really feel like an ass.
Hungover girl #2: Why do you feel like an ass?
Hungover girl #1: Well I did throw a drink on someone.
Hungover girl #2, nodding: And got kicked out of the bar twice.
Wilmington, North Carolina
Bimbette: … You, like, learn to flip people on the mat. My mom knows how to do that. She works with retarded kids and they, like, have come at her with scissors and tried to cut her throat before.
Barista: That doesn’t sound like a job I’d want to have.
Bimbette: No, she loves it.
Starbucks
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Overheard by: I just want my mocha, please
Teen #1: I could fuck your sister.
Teen #2: Yeah? Well, I could fuck a horse.
Teen #1: No you couldn't.
Teen #2: Why not?
Teen #1: You can't just sneak up on a horse and fuck it in the ass.
Teen #2: I wouldn't sneak up on it, I'd let it know I was there.
Teen #1: You'll get kicked in the face. And you'll die.
Teen #2, quietly: Whatever, dude… Just don't fuck my sister!
New York City, New York
