Mom to toddler girl: What fish should we get today? Salmon or tilapia or flounder?
Toddler girl: Is that “flounder” like in Little Mermaid?
Mom: Well, it's a fish, like flounder was.
Toddler girl: I want to eat flounder! Let's cook him. Mommy, can we eat Nemo too?
Costco
Fairfax, Virginia
Girl: Oh… Unh… Yeah, that's the spot.
Friend: Doesn't it hurt when you rub it so hard like that?
Girl: No, it… oh, that's blood. That's probably not good.
Clark Hall Women's Room
University of Virginia
Overheard by: girl in the stall
High school teacher: So they employed guerrilla warfare.
Chick: Wait, seriously? They sent gorillas out into the jungle? Wouldn't that be dangerous?
Vienna, Virginia
Girl, walking barefoot under the rain: Oh, the joys of Richmond. We are so gonna get hepatitis.
Bag lady: No! Don't do that, but if you do… give me some!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: singing in the rain
Teacher: Oh my god, I love you, Erica! You're like a little me!
Student: Ew!
Middle School
Virginia
Overheard by: Eh, there are worse things
Professor: So does anyone know what the word “matrix” means in Latin?
(silence)
Professor: Well it means “womb.” Now, why might that be? Let's think about it…I mean, I guess a womb is a pretty good place to put…things.
George Mason University
Fairfax, Virginia
Server: We need a button on the computer for this…
Boss man: For what?
Server: Balls on your face.
Midlothian, Virginia
Overheard by: bec-uhh
Enthusiastic little boy, entering restaurant with parents: Smells like snakes in here!
Restaurant
Charlottesville, Virginia
Overheard by: pasquinn
Middle-aged man: So, how is your husband?
Middle-aged woman: He left me three years ago.
Man: Oh. (awkward/embarrassed laugh) I'm sorry to hear that.
Woman: It's okay, I bought myself a kayak.
Charlottesville, Virginia
Random guy at party: I can't believe I almost peed on that girl's face.
Fredericksburg, Virginia
