Nerdy guy: Apparently it somehow involves running, but I’ve never ran before so I don’t know how.
UCLA Ackerman Terminal
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Juanito
Nerdy guy: Apparently it somehow involves running, but I’ve never ran before so I don’t know how.
UCLA Ackerman Terminal
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Juanito
Guy to friend: Dude, you just now figured out that The Beatles suck?
Public School
Las Vegas, Nevada
Poetry professor: I don’t know about you, but when I hear the word “sniffing” I think of sex!
SUNY Purchase
New York
Overheard by: S. Van-Ho
Dude #1: Man, I got so drunk on Saturday.
Dude #2: Did you pee your pants again?
Dude #1: No. [Dude #2 stares at him.] … Yes.
Dude #2: What’s wrong with you?
Dude #1: I don’t know.
Lake View Terrace, California
Tween girl to crowd of loitering friends: Everyone’s bisexual… except for Jenny.
Outside Starbucks
Avon, Connecticut
Six-year-old girl, gyrating hips: Mommy! Mommy! This is how babies are made!
Mother: That’s nice.
Gap Store, Stanford Shopping Center
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: this is why I don’t shop at the gap
Student: I have this irrational fear of being clunked over the head and shipped to a country whose alphabet I don’t know, so I’m trying to learn all these alphabets… I must be paranoid, I don’t know.
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: l_tau
Grocery store clerk: Did you find everything you were looking for today?
Customer: Yep.
Clerk: Oh good. The last woman said she didn’t, and I had no idea what to say. So I just looked at her and kind of shrugged my shoulders. She got so mad.
Customer: Then why do you ask?
Clerk: To be polite.
HyVee
Fort Dodge, Iowa
Lady #1: I’m ready, are you coming?
Lady #2: I think I may just stay here and smell the pencils for a while.
Animal Hospital
Abingdon, Maryland
Overheard by: Paying for food
