Remember When I Did That at My Son's Bar Mitzvah?

Woman, urinating and talking to friend in next stall: I was holding my piss in for so long, my Kegel muscles could choke a chicken!

Memorial Hall
Monson, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Sarah

Posted on November 24, 2015
Birds, Body parts, Default, Massachusetts, Names, Pee, Women

In Fact, I Eat Skinny People

Hot girl in line #1: Oh my god, I was so bad today! I had two whole scoops of ice cream for lunch.
Hot girl in line #2: You better watch it or you're not going to be able to fit into that cocktail dress you're buying.
Fat woman behind them: I fucking hate skinny people!

Department Store
Stockton, California

Posted on November 23, 2015
California, Clothes, Default, Fat people, Feelings, Food, Girls, Stores, Women

Which Is Why I've Named Her “Sids”

Grandma: She doesn't need those…she's getting too big for baby clothes.
Mom: I know, but I don't want her to be too big for baby clothes! I just want her to stay little and not start talking…or moving.

Shop
Buffalo, New York

Posted on November 22, 2015
Clothes, Default, Family ties, Kids, Moms, New York, Old folks, Shopping, Stores, Women

Or Just a Bestiality Fetishist?

10-year-old girl, excitedly, to 20-something woman wearing cat ears: Are you a furry?

GenCon 2008
Indianapolis, Indiana

Posted on November 18, 2015
Default, Girls, Indiana, Kids, Magic, Weirdness, Women, Words

Mommy Lost Him During That Spring Break Trip to Tijuana

Mother (giving four-year-old a children’s bible): Here, find Jesus for mommy.

Doctor’s Office
Ashland, Kentucky

Overheard by: Lola

Posted on November 12, 2015
Christianity, Default, Jesus, Kentucky, Moms, Offers and requests, Religion, Stupidity, Women

Is That the Best Way to Take the Moral High Ground?

Woman #1: So, you think he is?
Woman #2: No, you don't really think he is?
Woman #3: Hell, yes! I know he is. He is cheating on his wife and me. I'm gonna cut off his dick and then quit! That'll teach him.

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2007/08/hide-your-pet-rabbits-gentlemen.html

Overheard by: Jon

Posted on November 7, 2015
Default, Eavesdrop DC, Infidelity, Penis, Questions, Sexuality, Violence, Weirdness, Women

As Explained in The Necronomicoffee

Young woman: Then I read that conversation with… Oh, brain fart… You know, that news anchor? Anyway, that's when I decided unsweetened coffee was the mark of the usurper.

Hampton Bays
New York

Posted on October 25, 2015
Default, New York, Questions, Stupidity, TV shows, Women, Words

One Downmanship Is Fun!

Woman #1: Sorry I'm late, I had bad anxiety.
Woman #2: I have bad allergies and a hangover.
Woman #1: Well, I'm pregnant.
Woman #3, looking up suddenly: What!?
Woman #1: Top that!

Barnes & Noble
Birmingham, Alabama