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Girl #1: You're too horny for your own good. Why don't you just get a dildo?
Girl #2: Why would I want a dildo when I can just get the real thing whenever I want?

Emory University
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Hank

Posted on May 23, 2017
Advice, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Georgia, Girls, Questions, Sex, Toys, Wishes

I’m Just a Toxic Spill Waiting to Happen

Goth girl, to friend looking at military jackets: You can get those a lot cheaper at goodwill, dude.
Overweight friend: Not in my size! When fat people die, they leak, and then their clothes can’t be given to goodwill!

Starfest Sci-Fi Convention
Denver, Colorado

Posted on April 19, 2017
Advice, Clothes, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Diet & weight, Fat people, Friends, Girls, Goths, Gripes, Money, Offers and requests

In and Out, In and Out, All Night Long

Conductor: Mind the gap, doors closing. (train does not move) Those naughty, naughty doors.

London
England

Overheard by: ren

Posted on March 11, 2017
Advice, Conductors, Default, England, Offers and requests, Public transportation, Train

You’ll Note Your TAs Have Already Done So

Professor: We’ll talk later in the semester about how suicide will be a better choice. Now, I don’t want anyone committing suicide before the first exam, but it would be less for me to grade, so go ahead.

http://www.overheardatumbc.com

Posted on February 26, 2017
Advice, Overheard at UMBC, Teachers

Way to Ruin the Moment

Middle-aged woman: My wedding ring from my first marriage has new meaning now.
Friend: What's that?
Middle-aged woman: When I lost all that weight and it didn't fit anymore, I took it as a sign to divorce the bastard and marry Jesus Christ.
Friend: Why don't you just wear it on your toe instead?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/455563429/that-doesnt-have-the-same-effect.html

Overheard by: good lord.

Posted on February 14, 2017
Advice, Body parts, Default, Feelings, Friends, Jesus, Overheard in Minneapolis, Relationships, Women

You'd Be Lucky If They Were Only Rapists

Rednecks in pickup truck, driving past bus stop: Hey, pretty girl! Want a ride?
(pretty girl waiting for bus shakes her head, truck moves on)
Pretty girl, to male companion: So, is everyone here just really friendly, or what?
Male companion: No, they're creepy. Don't talk to them.

Highlandtown, Baltimore

Overheard by: tourist