…And It Fulfills Your Science Requirement?

College freshman girl: Wait… wait… Dinosaurs and vaginas!? (pause) Oh, now I get it!

Olympia, Washington

Overheard by: prefers dinosaurs

Posted on October 10, 2009
Animals, Questions, Students, Vagina, Washington

Preparing Me for the Cattiness Of Academia

Statistics teacher: There is a correlation between cats and happiness. Cats make people happy. But not all cats. I still have nightmares about some cats. When I was a little girl, there was this cat, Greta, who lived outdoors. I wanted to pet her, but she scratched up my whole arm and got her claws into my protoplasm!

Atlanta, Georgia

Posted on October 2, 2009
Animals, Body parts, Georgia, Happiness, Kids, Memory lane, Teachers, Violence, Wishes

And They Love Drinking Out Of Coke Bottles

Mother to young son: The sign says that polar bears are carnivores. That means they eat mostly plants, but will eat meat when they can find it.

Henry Vilas Zoo
Madison, Wisconsin

Overheard by: weeping for the future

Posted on September 17, 2009
Animals, Diet & weight, Food, Kids, Moms, Stupidity, Wisconsin, Words

Raise Your Hand If You're Married to Her

Woman, looking at exhibit containing jellyfish: But where are their brains? Where do you think their brains are? Where would they keep their brains? Where are the brains? Where are their brains? The brains? Where do you think they keep the brains? Huh… I wonder where their brains are?

Aquarium
North Carolina

Overheard by: Kellllyyyyy

Posted on September 15, 2009
Animals, Body parts, North Carolina, Questions, Women

I Thought You Didn't Want To?

Mom to toddler girl: What fish should we get today? Salmon or tilapia or flounder?
Toddler girl: Is that “flounder” like in Little Mermaid?
Mom: Well, it's a fish, like flounder was.
Toddler girl: I want to eat flounder! Let's cook him. Mommy, can we eat Nemo too?

Costco
Fairfax, Virginia

Posted on September 12, 2009
Animals, Food, Kids, Moms, Movies, Parenting, Questions, Should have used a condom, Virginia, Wishes, Words

How Do They Procreate?

Girl: The squid's like an octopus, don't you think?
Older woman: There's no pussy about it.

Birmingham
England

Overheard by: Helz

Posted on September 7, 2009
Animals, Compare and contrast, England, Girls, Old folks, Vagina, Women, Words

For Whom, Exactly?

High school teacher: So they employed guerrilla warfare.
Chick: Wait, seriously? They sent gorillas out into the jungle? Wouldn't that be dangerous?

Vienna, Virginia

Posted on September 5, 2009
Animals, Chicks, Idiots, Questions, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Students, Stupidity, Teachers, Virginia, Words

With His Seductive Banjo Music?

Hispanic girlfriend: Why the hell do you get Cesar Chavez Day off of work? Do you even know who Cesar Chavez is?
White boyfriend: Didn't he drive the snakes out of Mexico?

Orange County, California

Overheard by: Hispanic girlfriend