Loud woman in a bar: I thought I was going to have a nightmare, but I was disappointed.
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Cecil
Loud woman in a bar: I thought I was going to have a nightmare, but I was disappointed.
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Cecil
Guy to friend in a bar, after woman suddenly departed: What happened? Where'd she go?
Friend: I'm pretty sure she left. She kept on telling me she has no self-esteem at all and that she has a huge nose. So I just told her, “look, you really don't have a huge nose–you just have a Wicked Witch of the West nose.”
Guy: Fuck. Why do I even bother trying to fix you up with my friends?
Franco's Bar
Highland, Indiana
Waitress: Is this the book club? These are your free shots.
Bar
Allston, Massachusetts
20-something girl on cell: I'm sunburnt, drunk, and Asian, so why not? Why not?
The Wildcat Lounge
Santa Barbara, California
Woman #1 in bathroom stall: You should have an orgy!
Woman #2 in next bathroom stall: I know, that's what I said!
Bathroom, Bar
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: H
Drunk redneck: You wanna shoot a shotgun naked? Come to my house!
The Pour House
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: innocent bystander
Patron #1: Yeah, but everything's different in Hawaii. You can't even buy land there unless you were born there.
Patron #2: Actually, you can.
Patron #1: Yeah, but all their laws are different than ours.
Patron #2: You know that Hawaii is a state, right?
Starbucks
California
Tiny black girl: And then I had to have Buckley's, and you know what? It tastes exactly like jizz.
Asian girl, perplexed: You've had Buckley's?
Pub
Toronto
Canadia
20-something nasty-looking girl in pub, scratching furiously down trousers: Jesus, my clunge itches!
Leamington Spa
England
Guy walking into bathroom: Hey, is that your beer on top of that urinal?
Guy using urinal: You know it!
Prince Edward Tavern
Hamilton
Canadia
Overheard by: M@
